Funny Car Updates #19 5/26/00-6/1/00
 5/26/00
This REALLY applies to our old buddy Tanner:
Two weeks after Paisley’s transfer into the promotion department, his old boss got a phone
call. "You told me Paisley was a responsible worker!" yelled the furious head of promotion.
"Oh, he is," she confirmed. "In the year he worked in my department, the computer went
down five times and had to be completely reprogrammed, the petty cash got misplaced six
times, and I developed an ulcer. And each time Paisley was responsible."
That was the Tanner story as well. He’d polish a bracket, and break a windshield. He is OUT!
I‘m sucking up the last $500 of damage, plus the Garage Mahal window, and cutting my
losses. It will be interesting to see how much progress gets made on those areas in which
Tanner was supposed to accomplish something. I’m still having the remainder of a 4-camera
security system installed this weekend, as others will undoubtedly challenge me in the
future. Nothing like putting a lock on the door after the cow has gone. Randy and I spent
yesterday NOT working on the FC, but digging deeper into the lifeguard tower project. We
did spend a few minutes on the Lexan possibilities. As mentioned in a previous update,
MR-10 (Mar Resistant 10-year warranty) Lexan is touted as "approaching the hardness of
glass", with superior scratch resistance. It also costs about 4 times as much (literally) as
plain old plexi. I’m going to go the expensive route, as I want to be able to keep the
windows clean, and I have no plans on changing bodies in the next few years. Someone
remind me of this statement two years from now. We also worked out how to make the side
windows removable using Dzus fasteners. I previously noted Dave McDannel has this system
on his car. It makes for easy cleaning of the interior (pretty touch washing the car out
through an 8" access hole in the side window).
I’ve updated the web site with FC update #18, of course you’ve already read that long ago.
And added some books section blurbs, plus spent some time scanning voluminous pages from
transcriptions made twenty years ago for my Under Niagara book. Scanning is a test of
patience and methods. Whew!
Saw Chico Kodama at the Good Guys Car Show at Pomona last weekend, and he is thrilled
with the Hoffman/Dunn team. He is getting big exposure, but does not share in any income
the car generates. I reiterated to him my availability for sponsorship by Mooneyes at a
fraction of his nitro costs.

5/29/00
Tanner has FINALLY gone, for good. That’s really GOOD. In his normally idiotic way, he left,
and then came back two nights later and rang the bell at 11:30 pm. I scolded him and said
come back at 1 PM in the daylight to get his final things. Done, over, finished, kaput, finito,
adios sayonara, and definitely NOT aloha.
Now to get the Condor done using myself or others. Headers must come off, vacuum lines to
be finished, some gauges to be mounted underhood (I’ve roughed up the aluminum bracket
for three gauges), and other sundry details.
Meanwhile, life is really about gearing up for the mammoth lifeguard job. Still hunting for
financing. Got the kick-off meeting tomorrow, then we kick ass (somehow). I think it’s safe
(and very sad) to say that neither Randy nor I are looking to be at a CIFCA event this season.
We MAY get the cars out for some laps at LACR, but traveling for races? Nah. he’s got to sell
the Palmdale house, move into the Newbury digs, supervise the lifeguard project, finish his
FC, keep his darling Kristy happy, and oh yes, work at the fire house 200+ hours a month.
My story is old news.
The security boys did NOT return as scheduled on Sunday 5/27 to complete the 4 video
cameras installation.
The air-conditioning can’t keep up with the 105+ temps (about 78-80 degrees inside is all we
can get), and I’ll be having a long talk with my AC guy about either adding a unit, or finding
out why this won’t cut it.

In Japan, Sony Vaio Computers have replaced the impersonal and
unhelpful Microsoft error messages with their own Japanese haiku poetry, each only 17
syllables.

A file that big? It might be very useful. But now it is gone.
The Web site you seek can not be located but countless more exist.
Chaos reigns within. Reflect, repent, and reboot. Order shall return.
ABORTED effort: Close all that you have worked on. You ask way too much.
Windows NT crashed. I am the Blue Screen of Death. No one hears your screams. Yesterday it
worked. Today it is not working. Windows is like that.
First snow, then silence. This thousand dollar screen dies so beautifully.
With searching comes loss and the presence of absence:"My Novel" not found.
The Tao that is seen is not the true Tao, until you bring fresh toner.
Stay the patient course. Of little worth is your ire. The network is down.
A crash reduces your expensive computer to a simple stone. Three things are certain: Death,
taxes, and lost data. Guess which has occurred?
You step in the stream, but the water has moved on. This page is not here.
Out of memory. We wish to hold the whole sky, but we never will.
Having been erased, the document you're seeking must now be retyped.
Serious error. All shortcuts have disappeared. Screen. Mind.
Both are blank.

The exercise during history class one day was for each of the students to list whom they
considered to be the 11 greatest Americans. After half-an-hour everyone had turned in their
papers except Irwin, who was still scratching his head and thinking furiously. "What’s up?"
asked the teacher. "Can’t you come up with 11 great Americans?"
"I’ve got all but one," the student explained hastily. "It’s the quarterback I can’t
decide on."

 

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