1/3/01
Tomorrow will see BB here to press me into more action. With the garage happily cleaned up (not totally, but quite significantly), we are now free to get back on the list of things to complete, all towards getting the car out to make a lap. At this point, I'll work on getting the fuel pump on, getting new O-rings for the fuel cell connections, cleaning out the fuel cell and lines, etc.
Still unable to reach Dave Tuttle. If I can't find him tomorrow, I'll order some Dzus springs from Bickel or Summit and get on with it.
The Gremlin is progressing. Now I'm waiting on the proper headlight rings and headlight, and a new grille. Jeff Kennedy (Kennedy American), while very well-stocked, very helpful, and a nice fellow, is quite slow in actually getting around to orders. He finally got back to me after I ordered parts from someone else after many weeks.
He's the only game I can find right now for the remaining parts.
Bible Bob showed up with a refreshing surprise: a 2-page spread on the Qwik-Dick FC in Christian Motorsports. This is the Jesus version of the spread in Drag Racer on Adam Sorokin. Hey, it's great. I'll get it on the web soon, after I clean up the scan.

1/4/01
Gremlin headlight rings are not available from Kennedy, but some others are looking.
BB was here, and spent most of the day running back and forth to Orme Bros for O-rings, cleaning out the tank, and getting a drain plug for the fuel cell.
Using O-rings is not the preferred sealing method, though that's what I had. Using Teflon washers is better. Orme didn't have the #16 main line size Teflon washers, but Jim Maher did. And, I ordered the Dzus springs from Travis at Good Vibrations while I was on the phone with him and Jennifer. Overnight delivery. Cool. Went to McMaster-Carr for the Teflon for the drain plug (1-1/8" diameter), again, should be overnight.
So some chasing has yielded good results today. Randy stopped by this morning, and we determined the master cylinder for the front brakes had to be bad. We pulled it apart, and it wasn't pretty. A call to Dave at Airheart (he makes the master) solved the problem with two rebuild kits being shipped out today. While the rear master works OK, it is silly NOT to redo it while we're at it. So for about $60, we should have the brake situation solved and as good as it can get.
BB and Mike should be here Sunday, and we should have some parts to continue on toward a functional Qwik Dick.
BB had Orme cut down the primer line and put a new end on it to match up to the proper check valve placed there by Jim Rehfeld at Enderle a while back. Previously, the injector would suck the primer bottle dry, as the check valve was not working (but who knew?).
Several people have commented on how good and complete the car appears, each of whom hadn't seen the rig in a while. This is encouraging.
So, the goal for Sunday is to get the fuel cell drain plug in, the bulkhead fittings back in the tank, the fuel lines cleaned and installed, and the pump on. If we're REALLY hot, we'll set a battery in place, and try out the electrical.
If we set the mag back on a put on the headers, it should be ready to fire.

We'll also shoot for getting the master cylinders back on and bled.

Speaking of bleeding, I go to court in the morning against a woman who asked me to do research of about $1000 to determine the feasibility for building a barn and riding ring on her property. Once I completed my research, she rebuffed my month of work as "just bidding." No, no, no!!! A judge will decide in the morning. I've committed to remaining upbeat and "growing" this year. This usurious incident is behind me, and I'll consider any money to be "found" loot. One more lesson in life's great plan. Well, she didn't show, and I got a slam-dunk default. We'll see if it holds up for 31 days (appeal time window). So far I'm 3 for 3 in the last 2 weeks at small claims.
One more to go on the 16th.

One night, George W. Bush was awakened by George Washington's ghost. Bush saw him and asked, "President Washington, what is the best thing I could do to help the country?" "Set an honest and honorable example, just as I did,"
The next night, the ghost of Thomas Jefferson moved through the dark bedroom. "Mr. President Jefferson, what is the best thing I could do to help the country?" Bush asked.
"Cut taxes and reduce the size of government," advised Jefferson. Bush didn't sleep well the next night, and saw another figure moving in the shadows. It was Abraham Lincoln's ghost. "President Lincoln what is the best thing I could do to help the country?" Bush asked.
President Lincoln replied, "Go to the theater."

The McMaster-Carr delivery showed up here pronto this morning, so we have the drain plug Teflon washers.

1/7/01
OK, Mike and BB are here, and we're going to launch into some serious accomplishment. An interesting development aside from the FC has arisen: Frank Mastro, a fellow to whom I've given $1K on deposit to do five pieces of furniture upholstery, has defaulted on his rent and car payments on a silver PT Cruiser (in a lady friend's name). I MAY have a chance to cure the payments and take over the car.
Stay tuned.
Spoke with Rob Anderson re: the condor, and he recommends "cut and run."
Nick at Hamrick's suggests going retro and selling it. I'm in the middle, still thinking. If I get a grand for the V-6 motor, a grand for the car (roller), and just let Gene at AutoRite sell off the Godzilla AOD trans for his costs, I'd make $2K. If I can sell the 420" Windsor parts for another grand, that's $3K, and no more work to be done.
To restore the Condor to the original V-6 configuration will take $1500 for the trans, about $800 for the install, about $3K total with radiator and misc parts. The car MIGHT bring $5K, 6 tops. The math says cut and run. We'll see…..Meanwhile, I'll call Joe at Hurricane Towing and see what kind of deal we can work out for the return tow back to my front yard. Carter wants to view the roller before doing any work on it, so I might just as well bring it here.
Meanwhile, it's fuel fittings, lines, pump, and next week rebuilding the brake master cylinders, looking to make some noise very soon.
We got the fuel tank done, remade some stuff on the pans under it, got the lines installed, put on the pump, but we're looking for the bottom #16 main input fitting. Randy remembers Tanner having it off the pump and in a particular rolling tray. I'll look there in the morning. I also replaced a bunch of tubing and wiring.
I want to do some fuel line cleaning, as I see a bit on grundge in the ends of a few. No white crud, but a bit of brown slightly caked stuff in the fittings. Some engine brushes and solvent will be all we can do.
I still need to locate a parts washer. I mean, make or buy one. Randy thinks I sold my old one. McDannel wants $50 for his, and I'm not sure that's such a good deal. I'll check with Marty at MM Tools tomorrow and start the hunt.

1/8/01
Well, it's more like the hunted right now. I've spent the bulk of this rainy day restarting the Imac 500 about 2 dozen times (seriously). A file in the ACT (phonebook) database went bad, and it has screwed the WHOLE thing up mightily. I happen to be on the older G3 which I transferred to my secretary's desk a few months ago, and fortunately updated a lot of critical files to it today. The phonebook, however, remains NOT current, although working on this Mac right now.
This FC update file IS current (whew!). The parts for the master cylinders arrived today via UPS, so tomorrow Randy is coming early to help rebuild both masters, and get that item hopefully checked off the list. BB is due here at her usual 11 AM (and punctually at that), and we should have work for her as well. The fittings and lines are back in the tank, the tank is in, the fuel shutoff line is connected, the throttle cable connected, but not working properly. It has always had a hangup problem. I'll give it one more shot using WD-40, and if that doesn't cure it, I'll order a new one through Jim Maher. Put an e-mail to Jim, we'll see what shakes. As Maher got us the bag of Dzus springs (thanks Travis and Jennifer) PRONTO, I'll address the extra 5 windshield hold-downs with BB, set the restraints under the front hatch, maybe address the seat belts, and get some polishing belts ordered (Randy's machine, Randy's knowledge where to get them). Did some e-mail talking with very interested and curious James 2 (from the CIFCA chatboard), but he's back east, so no new crew member there.
Also spoke with webmeister Derek today, and he's working on incorporating a chatboard onto our website. That would be good.
I'm shooting to do some bolt listing and organizing tomorrow. BB has been very good about running down critical pieces needed to maintain progress. I'd like for both of us to get a clearer picture on what range of hardware is really included in the car. I've got 80 bins on the wall next to the car (you'd be able to see this if I'd get my act together and get some digital pix downloaded onto the site). So aside from shooting some pix, we'll be organizing.

1/9/01
Well, it goes like it goes, plans notwithstanding. Randy rebuilt both cylinders, notwithstanding the parts were not the same in both rebuild packets. A call to Dave at Airheart cleared up a few things. The rear worked just fine, like it did before we touched it, but the fronts STILL sucked. We pulled apart the master, no problem there. Still crap. So I switched front for rear masters, and it pumped up OK. So for whatever reason, that front master just won't work. Gonna send it to Dave tomorrow and see what the hell goes.
My trusty plumbers are here finishing the gas line to my heater (which they started last Friday). We've had NO heat since June, not that I frankly need it, but the wife, you know…………
Derek Dickson sent a sample of a new look for my home page, but we're not quite there yet with the changes.
It appears that nearly EVERY piece of the car has been rebuilt. Mind you, the car was completely redone from the ground up when I got it in 94, and it ran only two years. Man, surprising how much needed to be done here.
Maher has throttle cables, so we'll see what gives tomorrow. I may attend the CIFCA meeting tomorrow night, in which case I'll try to get a cable whilst I'm there (providing I get it together soon enough to give him notice).
The nearly endless "when are you going to run that thing, I wanna see it…" continues, this time from the plumber. Now if everyone who wants to see it run actually helped, it would happen very quickly. I don't know if the DLS car has as much money as their sponsorship lineup would indicate, but if so, I'm thrilled for them.

1/10/01
Meanwhile, I'll get a hold of Dave at Airheart tomorrow and see what the plan is with the bad front master cylinder.
What is odd is that the master itself is a VERY hard plastic, and it appears in perfect condition. There are no leaks, no cracks, nothing to indicate a problem. I don't know whether he works on them or just sells new, but it will make a nice spare if it can be repaired.
Finally accomplished the completion of something: the gas line for the heater. We're about to fire up the unit right now, some $600 later.
Of course, the valve INSIDE the unit is not on (or so says my never-will-show-up HVAC guy who installed the unit). As it's raining, I'm going to wait for a break in the downpour to go up on the roof and break open the unit.
Re: braking, Dave at Airheart made some suggestions, all of which we'd already tried. So I'm packing up the front master and sending it off to him.

1/11/01
LOTS of rain and hail, VERY cold day, all of which meant for no FC stuff. Did receive the spanking new grille for the Gremlin. Once I get the proper headlight rings, I'll run these remaining parts over to Nick and we'll paint the Gremlin parts and be done with that phase.
I need to sell 3 cars off for $7K each: the two Tbirds and the Gremlin. The Condor is going retro, with the spanking fresh motor from the 90. The 90 has the spanking fresh motor from the 89. I really hate to move on, as I really like these cars. But, I have the chance to get a PT Cruiser at a deal. How is that possible when they are in short supply? A friend of my step son has some problems, and without going into them, the bottom line is the car is available for take-over-payments. Depending on what kind of deal it was bought at, how much was put down, and what is still owing, I appear to be ready to do the deed. What I really need is to off the three aforementioned darling autos to pay for it. This would put me exactly where Dirty Dave McDannel suggested I get several years ago: into a totally stock car. He used to describe his Chevy van thusly: "I think it has a motor under the hood. But I wouldn't swear to it…." That was how he wanted to relate to his car. Now that he is without his race car, he still seems content to carry that view. I now understand, and am moving as possible to that. The Condor was towed back here today, and awaits Gary Carter's viewing to begin the retrofit.

1/12/01
This is about how I feel on a daily basis, except I'm not Jewish:
A Jewish businessman was in a great deal of trouble.
His business was failing, he had put everything he had into the business. He owed everybody-- it was so bad he was even contemplating suicide.

As a last resort he went to a rabbi and poured out his story of tears and woe.
When he had finished the rabbi said, "Here's what I want you to do: Put a beach chair and your Bible in your car and drive down to the beach. Take the beach chair and the Bible to the
water's edge, sit down in the beach chair, and put the Bible in
lap. Open the Bible; the wind will riffle the pages, but finally the open Bible will come to rest on a page. Look down at the page and read the first words you see. That will be your answer, that will tell you what to do."
A year later the businessman went back to the rabbi and brought his wife and children with him. The man was in a new custom- tailored suit, his wife in a mink coat, the children shining.
The businessman pulled an envelope stuffed with money
out of his pocket, gave it to the rabbi as a donation to thank him for his advice. The rabbi recognized the benefactor, and was
curious.
"You did as I suggested?"he asked.
"Absolutely," replied the businessman.
"You went to the beach?"
"Absolutely."
"You sat in a beach chair with the Bible in your
lap?"
"Absolutely."
"You let the pages riffle until they stopped?"
"Absolutely."
"And what were the first words you saw?"
"Chapter 11."

1/13/01
Well, Mikey has bailed for tomorrow. Between soccer and the Raider's game, he's, well, unavailable. BB is still on, so we're hoping to make some progress.
The word on the PT is it was bought for WAY too much money to make it attractive. I can spend over book anytime on my own.
So sadly, I'll pass on it.
I still am going to move the other cars out, though.
The Condor is in the driveway waiting for a look-see by Carter, the stock motor is about ready, and I have some decision-making to do on a transmission, as I can't see throwing in the HUGELY strong AutoRite AOD behind a stock motor.
I will be putting ads with the Super Coupe Club of America (SCCOA), and an on-line hot rod ad service, AND the Recycler Auto Buys. I got zippo from the Daily News and Dragster ads.

1/14/01
BB showed up, absolutely on time as usual. Considering the Raider game was on, I feel she really went for it to work on the car (she really digs football). We worked from 1-6:15 PM on the wiring at the rear of the car, set the batteries (the old Optimas, but at least one took a charge), rewired a bunch of stuff, wired in the batteries, determined the grounding situation, welded two tabs for grounds near the batteries, and generally cleaned up the wiring. Basically, we've re-verified the wiring scheme, checked circuits, double-checked the rear master shutoff switch, checked the mag kill circuits, and got it ready to fire. Of course the 12-volt battery I chose is dead. I'm running two Optimas in series. The 24-volt position is just for cranking the starter motor, nothing else, and the rear battery is tapped at 12 volts for all the car stuff. Next we'll lower the body back on, plug in the light bar and the Parker Pumper, and see if they function. We need to just do a little minor stuff at the terminal strip on the body, but the wiring is all there and good. We desperately need to organize, put away, and I have to make some decisions as to what goes where, how to create more slots for bolts and small parts, etc. We spent 20 minutes in vain searching for the box of shrink tubing, and that was the capper.
Regarding the possible PT, it's no go. Frank paid $27K, there's about $25K owing on it, and sticker price is about $22K. I'm offering $17.5K, but she'll certainly opt to sell it herself and try to get more. I see no reason to rush into debt and pay top dollar. There is a turbo version with 200 HP coming soon, so the earlier versions should drop in price then, while the Turbos will get huge premiums. The PT's are still in very short supply, and while a nice car, I guess I should rid myself of the three cars I have now first. Of course, if they don't all sell the same day, the bills will just eat the dough instantly. This is one reason I wanted to go for this PT deal. But this is all conjecture. It's too much, so pass.
The front master is bagged and will be UPS'd tomorrow to Dave at Airheart. BB will return Thursday to continue on. I'm going to put about an hour a day in the garage working on the parts storage, etc. until then.

1/19/01
Nothing has gotten done on the car this week. Sadly, our darling little 8-month old dog, Rogie, got hit out front and we had to put him down. This has been devastating. After all, they are just perfect beings with short legs, who gift us with the example of how to love unconditionally. Aside from the devastating emotional loss, the reality of spending $700 to kill our dog has put the momentum back a bit. BB did show up yesterday, but took a bit ill and had to cut it short.

Several things are not getting done, among them is skiing. The first season, 1971, I skied 31 days. I haven't had that many days COMBINED in the last twenty years! For those of you who might actually get out there this season, the following list of exercises will help get you prepared:

16. Visit your local butcher and pay $30 to sit in the walk-in freezer for a half an hour. Afterwards, burn two $50 dollar bills to warm up.

15. Soak your gloves and store them in the freezer after every use.

14. Fasten a small, wide rubber band around the top half of your head before you go to bed each night.

13. If you wear glasses, begin wearing them with glue smeared on the lenses.

12. Throw away a hundred dollar bill-now.

11. Find the nearest ice rink and walk across the ice 20 times in your ski boots carrying two pairs of skis, accessory bag and poles. Pretend you are looking for your car. Sporadically drop things.

10. Place a small but angular pebble in your shoes, line them with crushed ice, and then tighten a C-clamp around your toes.

9. Buy a new pair of gloves and immediately throw one away.

8. Secure one of your ankles to a bedpost and ask a friend to run into you at high speed.

7. Go to McDonald's and insist on paying $8.50 for a hamburger. Be sure you are in the longest line.

6. Clip a lift ticket to the zipper of your jacket and ride a motorcycle fast enough to make the ticket lacerate your face.

5. Drive slowly for five hours - anywhere - as long as it's in a snowstorm and you're following an 18-wheeler.

4. Fill a blender with ice, hit the pulse button and let the spray blast your face. Leave the ice on your face until it melts. Let it drip into your clothes.

3. Dress up in as many clothes as you can and then proceed to take them off because you have to go to the bathroom.

2. Slam your thumb in a car door. Don't go see a doctor.

1. Repeat all of the above every Saturday and Sunday until it's time for the real thing!

1/21/01
Mike and I spent from 1 PM to 10:30 PM on the clean up and windshield. We pulled the window out several times, adding washers to the Dzus springs to get proper tension, and allow for using ONE length for all (well, almost all). For the most part it was successful. However, the bolts and nylocks have suddenly become a problem on the last few, locking up on the wires, pulling through the fiberglass, being a major pain in the butt. The "F" word would be appropriate about now.

When the F word is Appropriate

Top Ten times in history when using the "F" word was appropriate:

10. "What the f*** was that?" - Mayor of Hiroshima
9. "Where did all these f***ing Indians come from?" - Custer
8. "Any f***ing idiot could understand that." - Einstein
7. "It does SO f***ing look like her!" - Picasso
6. "How the f*** did you work that out?" - Pythagoras
5. "You want WHAT on the f***ing ceiling?" - Michaelangelo
4. "I don't suppose it's gonna f***ing rain." - Joan of Arc
3. "Scattered f***ing showers... my ass!" - Noah
2. "I need this parade like I need a f***ing hole in my head!" - J.F.K.
Ø "Who the f*** is going to know?" - Bill Clinton

BB is out until Thursday. Meanwhile, I should be getting the master cylinder back. It worked perfectly for Dave at Airheart. So we'll try once again. Gave Gary Carter his vacuum bleeder back, after sucking a gallon or so of fluid through it. The bleeder fittings on my brakes are of the smaller size, not the normal automotive size, hence it appears that's why I saw SO much air with no improvement in the pedal at all. Should be getting the new hoses for the Parker Pumper any time as well. Mikey and I worked for quite a while on the electrical and starter. Got a REAL odd thing going here: the starter was rewired to accept 24 volts, years ago. Both starters as a matter of fact. They can handle 24 volts anyway, it just makes them spin twice as fast, and makes starting our motors WAY easier. The solenoids were apparently upgraded to handle 24 volts (it's been 4 years, so I'm foggy on this), although as used, the solenoids don't see anything but 12 volts. The armature sees the 24 volts when triggered by the solenoid. Well, I got two functioning batteries in there for now, and the starters won't turn on 24 volts. The one in the car won't do anything but kick the solenoid. The spare does the same thing, but WILL kick and turn on 12 volts just fine. Actually, the spare turns slowly on 24, and fast on 12!!! It's like in reverse of what should be happening. REAL odd. Going to talk with Monty at IMI tomorrow story and sort it out. Man, just about everything on this car is being revamped. Checked on some new Optima batteries, and it's about $280 for a pair of red top models. These are the quicker recharging type, NOT the blue or yellow deep cycle. As we need top cranking voltage every round, the red tops are the ticket. I have a 50-amp 24-volt charger to kick them between rounds.
Still waiting on the Gremlin headlight rings and lens, but do have a NEW grille. Nick is just waiting for the final pieces to do the painting. The Condor still sits, and I'm now back in limbo, as Carter felt going back with the Windsor motor looked easier. ARGHHHH!!!

1/23/01
If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented?

If people from Poland are called "Poles", why aren't
people from Holland called "Holes"?

Why do we say something 'is out of whack'? What's a
whack?

Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy
adultery?

If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?

Why do women wear evening gowns to nightclubs?
Shouldn't they be wearing night gowns?

If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

When someone asks you, "A penny for your thoughts,"
and you put your two cents in, what happens to the
other penny?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a
broker?

Why do croutons come in airtight packages? It's just
stale bread to begin with.

Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist
but a person drives a race car not called a racist?

Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposites?

Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?

If horrific means to make horrible, does terrific mean
to make terrible?

Why isn't 11 pronounced onety one?

"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the
English language. Could it be that "I do" is the
longest sentence?

If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked,
doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted,
musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed,
tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?

Do Roman paramedics refer to IV's as "4's"?

Why is it that if someone tells you that there are 1
billion stars in the universe you will believe them.
But if they tell you a wall has wet paint you will
have to touch it to be sure?

Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?

What hair color do they put on the drivers licenses of
bald men?

I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible
a whole lot more as they get older, then it dawned on
me, they're cramming for their final exam.

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with
tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do
Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?

You never really learn to swear until you learn to
drive.

No one ever says "It's only a game," when their team
is winning.

Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it
didn't zigzag?

Last night I played a blank tape at full blast. The
mime next door went nuts.

If a person with multiple personalities threatens
suicide, is that considered a hostage situation?

Whatever happened to preparations A through G?

1/24/01
For all the men who like to send blonde jokes, paybacks are hell...
How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the world
does it take to do the dishes?
Both of them.
Why did the man cross the road?
He heard the chicken was a slut.
Why don't women blink during foreplay?
They don't have time.
Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize one egg?
They don't stop and ask for directions.
How does a man show that he is planning for the future?
He buys two cases of beer.
What is the difference between men and government bonds?
The bonds mature.
Why are blonde jokes so short?
So men can remember them.
How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
We don't know; it has never happened.
Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring
and good looking?
They all already have boyfriends.
What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
A widow.
When do you care for a man's company?
When he owns it.
Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.
How did Pinocchio find out he was made of wood?
His hand caught fire.
How do you get a man to do sit-ups?
Put the remote control between his toes.
What did God say after creating man?
I must be able to do better than that.
What did God say after creating Eve?
Practice makes perfect.
What is the one thing that all men at singles bars have in common?
They're married.

1/25/01
BB showed right on time, such a good crew member!! BB's day was spent running parts and promotions. The parts were some small bolts and the batteries she took to Brad at Valley Battery. One of the old Optimas appeared good, we'll see. Of 4 misc batteries she took there, we MAY have two good ones. The other Optima is definitely a goner. The bracket in the FC is set for Optimas, so that's pretty much that. What is confusing is that the starters don't work well on 24 volts, but do on 12 volts. Randy postulates one battery might have nearly no current capacity, which rings odd to me if it is holding voltage, but we'll see what Brad the battery man says. He can get Optimas under a different label (they OEM them to lots of companies) for a little less than the going rate. She also garnered several discount passes at AutoZone for the upcoming Winternationals. As we have a fair crowd going, these are going to be VERY useful. I did have to buy a case of Pennzoil on the first go-round, but I'll need it anyway.
Got the front master back from Dave at Airheart today, so the next event should be putting that back in a seeing if we can now miraculously create some front brake pedal. Dave suggests disconnecting the linkage to the rear master and pumping ONLY the front one for the bleeding process. That's about the only thing we haven't already tried. This may require a bit of fabrication, but what the heck.

I noted before that the relationship between jokes on these updates and FC progress are inversely proportional.
So while we're standing by, here are some Words To Live By:

I can only please one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow is not looking good either.

You can go anywhere you want if you look serious and carry a clipboard.

I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by.

Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky, and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling?

Tell me what you need, and I'll tell you how to get along without it.

Accept that some days you are the pigeon and some days the statue.

Needing someone is like needing a parachute. If they aren't there the first time, chances are you won't be needing them again.

I don't have an attitude problem, you have a perception problem.

My reality check bounced.

On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the escape key.

I don't suffer from stress. I am a carrier.

Everybody is somebody else's weirdo.

Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level, then beat you with experience.

A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick in the butt.

After any salary raise, you will have less money at the end of the month than you did before.

The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going to get.

Eat one live toad the first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.

People who go to conferences are the ones who shouldn't.

If it wasn't for the last minute, nothing would get done.

When you don't know what to do, walk fast and look worried.

When confronted by a difficult problem, you can solve it more easily by reducing it to the question, "How would the Lone Ranger handle this?"

At age 4.....success is.....not peeing in your pants
At age 12....success is.....having friends
At age 16....success is.....having a drivers license
At age 20....success is.....having sex
At age 35....success is.....having money

At age 50....success is.....having money
At age 60....success is.....having sex
At age 70....success is.....having a drivers license
At age 75....success is.....having friends
At age 80....success is.....not peeing in your pants

THE VALUE OF UNDIES

From the Sydney Morning Herald Australia comes this story of a central west couple who drove their car to K-Mart only to have their car break down in the parking lot. The man told his wife to carry on with the shopping while he fixed the car there in the lot. The wife returned later to see a small group of people near the car. On closer inspection she saw a pair of male legs protruding from under the chassis. Although the man was in
shorts, his lack of underpants turned private parts into glaringly public ones. Unable to stand the embarrassment she dutifully stepped forward, quickly put her hand UP his shorts and tucked everything back into place. On regaining her feet she looked across the hood and found herself staring at her husband who was standing idly by. The mechanic, however, had to have three stitches in his head!!!

1/28/01
Super Bowl Sunday is seeing NO work on the race car.
Lots of chips, sodas, etc. Pursuant to that:
A dietitian was once addressing a large audience in Chicago.
"The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have
killed most of us sitting here, years ago.
"Red meat is awful. Soft drinks erode your stomach lining.
Chinese food is loaded with MSG. Vegetables can be disastrous, and none of us realizes the long-term harm caused by the
germs in our drinking water. "But there is one thing that is
the most dangerous of all and we all have, or will, eat
it. Can anyone here tell me what food it is that causes the most grief and suffering for years after eating it?" A 75-year-old man in the front row stood up and said, "Wedding cake.

1/31/01
Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?

A: No.

Q: Did you check for blood pressure?

A: No.

Q: Did you check for breathing?

A: No.

Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?

A: No.

Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?

A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.

Q: But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless.

A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere.

1/31/01
Work has taken MAJOR priority of the FC. I WILL get a race hit this weekend at the Winternationals for two days, along with John, BB, Richard, etc.

2/1/01
BB showed today for FC work with two more Pomona discount passes, but we had wet clear coat on some cabinets in the garage, so no work could occur in there today. John and I had a big day of shoveling heavy mud at a job site, and I am just whacked. It's early nite-nite for me.

2/2/01
Pomona was awesome as usual. The pits have been reconfigured to where the manufacturers' midway was. The box office has been relocated to a better spot. The mfgs are right inside the entry… very cool. The racing was inspiring as usual. Some big # for 90% nitro, like 315 mph! Pro stocks were running high 6.8's, the alcohol dragster field was the lowest in history, with the bump at 5.57!!! Wow!! The alky FC bumps is like 5.87…way fast. It's refreshing to see how much going two seconds quicker and about 60 mph faster would cost (about a million bucks). Whew!! Even Mert Littlefield didn't qualify. Now that's a tough field. What a deal CIFCA is! Aside from a comp dragster, we are the absolutely cheapest way to go 7.50 there is. AND, we get paid to go racing!! Looked at the numerous Alky and fuel FC chassis and took in how things are done, and where I can make ours look cooler (basically polish, anodize, and replate everything). Ours actually looks pretty good, things are routed sensibly and neatly, and it is as uncluttered as can be right now.

2/3/01
Real nice two days at the Winternationals. LOTSA FC action. Very inspirational. Rich Baida (BB's dad) used to be in promotions. We talked about what could be done to get some sponsorship. It will remain to be seen if I can convince him to put some energy into it. I got Force's autograph on a hat. BB got a picture with him, and her jacket signed by him and several other luminaries.

2/4/01
Mike and I spent a productive afternoon on the FC, and nearly missed the live telecast of the Pomona Finals! I walked in at 8 PM and thought I'd missed it. Wow, how about Joe Amato and his new driver? Isn't that just the greatest?

Speaking of new relationships:
A young Jewish couple got married and left on their honeymoon.
When they got back, the bride immediately called her mother.
"Well," said her mother, "so how was the honeymoon?" "Oh, mama," she replied, "the honeymoon was wonderful! So romantic". Suddenly she burst out crying.
"But, mama, as soon as we returned Sam started using the most horrible language - things I'd never heard before!
I mean, all these awful* 4-letter words!
You've got to come get me and take me home . . .
PLEASE MAMA!"
"Sarah, Sarah," her mother said, "calm down!
Tell me, what could be so awful.
WHAT 4-letter words?"
"Please don't make me tell you, mama," wept the daughter,
"I'm so embarrassed they're just too awful!
COME GET ME, PLEASE !!!"
"Darling, baby, you must tell me what has you so upset . . . Tell your mother these horrible 4-letter words!"
Still sobbing, the bride said, "Oh, mama...words like Dust, Wash, Iron, Cook ………
" I'll pick you up in ten minutes," said the mother.

2/5/01
Back hard at work and bidding, but did get some work done yesterday after Mike left. I repaired the several pulled-through bolt holes holding the Dzus springs in place using fiberglass and bondo. Worked great. I found that one problem we had was that the 10-24 nylocks were the WRONG thread or size (notwithstanding the label said they were correct), causing us to severely stress on getting them threaded all the way down the bolts. What a pain in the butt. I added another fastener along the upper right on the windshield. I still need to adjust the spring height on a few fasteners, but this is easily accomplished by crushing the loops at each end with pliers. It does require removing the windshield (18 fasteners), and massaging the springs. No biggie. I want them all to use the same gold .550 long full Bore fastener. I filled in the extra holes around the side windows, glassed and bondoed the 2 old air lift switch holes in the rear, and tuned up a few small dings around the body. I also got the rear panel/tree support glassed back in with a spacer. We have one support going up to the rear deck area which is now about 1/4" too low. My only real solution is to cut the tree tubing, put a slip fitting on it, and reweld it in the correct length. I am NOT going to stress ANYTHING to get it to fit! I noticed at the Winternationals that the fuel cars all had a very elaborate tree in the rear, just like mine! How about that? 'Course, they are handling about 4 tons of down force back there. I'm just trying to hold the damn thing together.
Talked with Randy today, and he is struggling with getting his injector to fit. His large buzzard injector will not fit inside his windshield/body, so he's going to try his 2-hole shotgun injector. Actually the shotgun is really cool-looking, and should work just fine. His paper-thin FC body is physics-defying. He refuses to put any more work in it, and will paint it at its present level of being blocked and sanded. He fears any beefing up underneath will only warp it and undo his prior work. Man, what a contrast in bodies between his and mine. Mine is the heavyweight champeen of all time, his has to be the lightest, eggshell-like FC skin in history. His may fold, mine may crack. It'll be interesting, at the very least.

2/6/01
Once upon a time, in a land far away, a beautiful, independent, self assured princess, happened upon a frog as she sat
contemplating ecological issues on the shores of an unpolluted pond in a verdant meadow near her castle.
The frog hopped into the Princess' lap and said: Elegant Lady, I was once a handsome Prince, until an evil witch cast a spell upon me. One kiss from you, however, and I will turn back into the dapper, young Prince that I am and then, my sweet, we can marry and set up housekeeping in yon castle with my Mother, where you can prepare my meals, clean my clothes, bear my children, and forever feel grateful and happy doing so.

That night, while enjoying lightly sautéed frogs legs
seasoned in a white wine and onion cream sauce, she chuckled to herself and thought: "I don't fucking think so."

Last week we took some friends out to a new restaurant, and noticed that the waiter who took our order carried a spoon in his shirt pocket. It seemed a little strange, but I ignored it. However, when the busboy brought out water and utensils, I noticed he also had a spoon in his shirt pocket, then looked around the room and saw that all the staff had spoons in their pocket. When the waiter came back to serve our soup I asked, "Why the spoon?" "Well," he explained, "the restaurant's owners hired Anderson Consulting, experts in efficiency, in order to revamp all our processes. After several months of statistical analysis, they concluded that customers drop their spoons 73.84 percent more often than any other utensil. This represents a drop frequency of approximately 3 spoons per table per hour. If our personnel is prepared to deal with that contingency, we can reduce the number of trips back to the kitchen and save 1.5 man-hours per shift." As luck would have it I dropped my spoon and he was able to replace it with his spare spoon. "I'll get another spoon next time I go to the kitchen instead of making an extra trip to get it right now." I was rather impressed. The waiter served our main course and I continued to look around. I then noticed that there was a very thin string hanging out of the waiter's fly. Looking around, I noticed that all the waiters had the same string hanging from their flies. My curiosity got the better of me and before he walked off, I asked the waiter, "Excuse me, but can you tell me why you have that string right there?" "Oh, certainly!" he answered, lowering his voice. "Not everyone is as observant as you. That consulting firm I mentioned, also found out that we can save time in the restroom." "How so?" "See," he continued, "by tying this string to the tip of…. you know what, we can pull it out over the urinal without touching it and that way eliminate the need to wash the hands, shortening the time spent in the restroom by 76.39 percent." "Okay, that makes sense, but . . if the string helps you get it out, how do you put it back in?" "Well," he whispered, lowering his voice even further, "I don't know about the others, but I use the spoon."

General Custer and an Indian scout are on top of a hill overlooking Bull Run, when they start to hear drums in the distance.
General Custer says, "I don't like the sound of those drums!"

The Indian scout listens for a second and says,
"That's not their regular drummer."

2/7/01
1 George Bush: When you rearrange the letters: He bugs Gore
2 Dormitory: When you rearrange the letters: Dirty Room
3 Evangelist: When you rearrange the letters: Evil's Agent
4 Desperation: When you rearrange the letters: A Rope Ends It
5 The Morse Code: When you rearrange the letters: Here Come Dots
6 Slot Machines: When you rearrange the letters: Cash Lost in 'em
7 Mother-in-law: When you rearrange the letters: Woman Hitler
8 Snooze Alarms: When you rearrange the letters: Alas! No More Z's
9 A Decimal Point: When you rearrange the letters: I'm a Dot in Place
10 The Earthquakes: When you rearrange the letters: That Queer Shake
11 Eleven plus two: When you rearrange the letters: Twelve plus one
12 And for the grand finale:
PRESIDENT CLINTON OF THE USA: It can be rearranged
(with no letters left over, and using each letter only once) into:

TO COPULATE HE FINDS INTERNS

2/10/01
I wonder what we can spell with the words: I am so tired of talking about this and not making a pass yet? Or, you're so tired of………
With the rains of the last few days, and more to come, the Garage Mahal is paying dividends in a big way. The operation has pretty much been off the track for close to 5 years because of MONEY, or the lack thereof. I could have bought McDannel's whole operation for a minute fraction of what I put into the garage, etc. just to house my own operation. Of course, then I would have had TWO FC operations sitting in my driveway!! Gordon Mineo is supposedly selling his fuel operation right now with two complete cars, oodles of spares, truck and trailer, the whole magilla, for about $200K. Man, can I relate.
I contacted Mike O'Brien, who built the chassis, set the Tbird body on, and did some remaking on the original reincarnation of the FC in 94, about remaking the tin. It really is not feasible to do it remote control from Van Nuys to Sacramento, and not cost effective either. So we'll look around locally and work on that. I have been unable to reach Dave Tuttle for over two months. He sadly lost his dad a few weeks ago, and that hasn't helped, either. So the final bit of welding has yet to take place. Metal Maddness welding artist Mike Peery is having an exhibition/party tonight at his shop, and I'll run by a see what's shakin'.
Work has been happening, but it's the same old cash flow struggle against what feels like infinity. I've read inspiring stories of people coming back from the ashes of desperate debt (like me) to achieve greatness. I'm working on becoming an inspirational story here. Meanwhile, it's lots of perspiration. Randy, whose automobile knowledge is the Cheops pyramid to my dixie up, has still encountered some maddening things to handle with his progress as well. It's all this big learning thing. All that deep sharing being said, BB is scheduled for tomorrow, Sunday, and we'll get on some more organizing, setting the front master cylinder back on, getting the proper length injector bolts in (I had forgotten about the blower restraint plate and its 1/4" or so of thickness, which caused me to cut down 4 bolts for now no reason). The driveshaft tunnel and tin are the most intense fabrication stumbling blocks to making a pass right now. The windshield and side windows are serviceable, the lift system appears good (but we need to attach the front latch back on), the tires are obviously way good, and the brakes…well, you know that one. The chutes are fresh, the belts are updated, the tin….ugh……..the batteries (I just never got around to calling Brad all week). Brad should have the two new Optimas in stock now, for a paltry $260 for the pair. We can then check just what is really what with the starters, etc.
Meanwhile I'm chasing job checks to cover my house payments, etc. Spoke with Nick at the paint shop, and he wants to have the exterior paint be the last thing on the car. So he is going to help locate some bulk Zolotone (gray, speckled, granite-looking paint) for the underside of the body. It would take a couple of cases of cans to do it. We also need to patch a few spots in the tin where I had previously run some ventilation lines (for my suit and helmet). I still have not gotten the revised hoses from Harold at Parker Pumper.

2/11/01
No BB, but Mikey and I did hit it hard, despite the rain. We re-mounted the front master cylinder, set the proper length bolts in the injector hat, and turned our attention to the CO2 bottle hatch and the blower collar on the body. We set the bolts back in the hatch, and set the two angle pieces which keep the lid from falling through the body. The blower collar had been ripped into three pieces years ago when I lost the trans input shaft at LACR, over-revved the motor (kissing valves and ultimately leading to the destruction of the motor in Vegas), and the consequent snapping of the blower belt at high RPM. That Kevlar whip blew portions of the hood off, one of which I signed and which was auctioned at our yearly banquet. The aluminum collar which surrounded that opening was instantly made into 3 chunks, and it was re-welded a couple of years ago when I remade the rear body pivot. Today we took on pounding it back into close shape, redrilling the holes, mounting it, and grinding on the welds and some high spots. It needs some artistic work and a few welding build-ups, cracks filled, followed by grinding and polishing, to put it back into primo shape.
Nock claims to be looking into some Zolotone for me, and I'll need to remind him for several days in a row this week to get some answers. I'll do my own research as well.
The Gremlin is to be finished this week. Any bets??
I'm also going to look for a parachute pod for the FC. I'd like to get them on a stand. They worked fine, but why not a little improvement? I also need to get to welding the final tabs on the wheelie bars to carry the netting (which prevents the shroud lines from hitting the ground and hanging up in the bars). Mike and I mad e quick run to the hardware store, got a box of the correct 8-32 nylocks, and continued on in delightful fashion.
I HAVE to get in that garage and clean it up, organize some more.
I scored a great hit on some electronics and tools on Friday. Sandy's Electronics called it quits, and for a few hours on their final day, were selling stuff at incredible deals for cash. I scored what I could. Now I have a few things MORE for which to find a place in the Garage Mahal.

2/12/01
You know the lotto would sure help move this operation along. Consider this:
Did you hear about the $3,000,000 Tennessee State Lottery?
The winner gets $3 a year for a million years.

2/16/01
Harold Nicks HAD forgotten about the hoses, and got them here the next day. THANKS! BB is due here Sunday, and we'll mount the hoses, do a little more body work, perhaps get the mag back on, and if I can get Brad to part with the Optimas tomorrow without cash, try the electrical.
Reached Dave Tuttle, who is going to be around henceforth for the rollbar stiffeners.
Mike Peery had his gala sales party at his welding shop (nice affair!), and is available to come out and weld, and possibly relieve me of my TIG welder.
Talked with Randy about putting some body stiffeners on his car, aluminum metal-working, getting some forming tools, etc. I guess I COULD learn how to bead roll, etc., for about the price of paying someone else to do it. More tools…arghhh!
The Cool Suit remains ready (but I have no $). Nick is supposedly painting the Gremlin tonight.
I missed the Spectrum Auction around the corner, at least as far as putting the Gremlin in it. I may drop by Sunday to see what some of the cars are going for. Dropped in today to preview some cars. Looks expensive.

2/18/01
BB and Mikey worked diligently today. I taught them both some welding. BB has a gift for it. BB polished some fire system and brake lines, and we then concentrated on what needed doing to make a lap. As I have no batteries as yet (NO $, but the Optimas as there waiting), we couldn't investigate the electrical function nor the starter(s). I attempted to put the oil temperature sensor in the bung in the pan, but there apparently is an interface required, as the sender leaks and is loose. I recall some sort of bushing or adapter. No where is it??
We put the mag back on, although it took several attempts. First, the mag hold-down band broke the T-bolt (I over amped on it with the air wrench). Then the larger hold-down didn't want to center on the mag-base connection. After some rotating and adjusting, I realized I couldn't find the plastic interface that connects the mag to the pump drive. I had an extra in my extra mag case. But where is the original? Probably with the tin….
Mike and I concentrated on the fuel lines and the primer pump. The pump was located on the lower left frame rail, but needed a second mounting point to be secure. I decided to relocate the pump on the top frame rail, just ahead of the breather tube connection. I welded a plate, drilled it, ground on it, and painted the area. Looks fine, works better. And I didn't have to change either line. I do have to lengthen the 12-volt wire to it, and, insure the ground is good. Incidentally, we DID remove the mag to weld the new pump stand!!
In some Garage Mahal news, my 1967 CSUN college pysch professor, Roy Griffith, gifted me with the components for an absolutely KILLER sound system: (2) Cerwin-Vega 18" woofers and (2) JBL LE-85 horns, drivers, and lenses. There is a long story about these components, but the short of it is that he has graciously given them to me for free, and I will now work on constructing a neato set of MONSTRO speakers for the garage.
I have also gotten my digital camera to work. However, the Imac 500 is having problems opening up the pix. The computer is freezing, as if low on memory. How can 128 megs of RAM on a 32 gig hard drive have a memory problem, with no other programs running? This is a job for Manco or the computer wizard, Randy (not Laur).
I also got the Condor crank over to Crankshaft Grinding, and Russ there turned me onto Rich at West Coast Cylinder Heads, who recommends the Canfields with some port work for the 420" Windsor/Condor. I also got a call from Mustangs Etc. regarding my rebuilt 3.8 Liter (232") Super Couple supercharged motor. If that goes, it would be a nice leg up on getting the Condor done. And, oh yes, despicable Dave Smith, the ultra-flake who boned me over 2 years ago on my Condor motor (for about $6K), has finally signed a stipulated judgment with the San Bernardino DA and is forwarding a check for $5632 to me, claimed to be cashable on March 15th. If it bounces, he is automatically guilty and will be levied an EXTREMELY hefty fine.
And, the Gremlin IS painted, completely. It is now a matter of having Chinto do the color-sanding and polishing. I didn't get it done in time for the Spectrum Auction around the corner at Airtel, but I did pop in a couple of times to view the offerings.
It all looked pretty darn pricey, but then who knows what the reserves were. The fiscal chemistry wasn't there (free would have been good).

Here's some new chemistry:

Element Name: WOMANIUM

Symbol: WO

Atomic Weight: (don't even go there)

Physical properties:
Generally soft and round in form.

Boils at nothing and may freeze any time.

Melts when treated properly. Very bitter if not used well.

Chemical properties: Very active. Highly unstable.
Possesses strong affinity with gold, silver, platinum,
and precious stones. Violent when left alone. Able to
absorb great amounts of exotic food. Turns slightly green
when placed next to a better specimen.

Usage: Highly ornamental. An extremely good catalyst for
dispersion of wealth. Probably the most powerful income
reducing agent known.

Caution: Highly explosive in inexperienced hands!
_____________________________________________________

Element Name: MANIUM

Symbol: XY

Atomic Weight: (180 +/- 50)

Physical properties: Solid at room temperature, but gets
bent out of shape easily. Fairly dense and sometimes
flaky. Difficult to find a pure sample. Due to rust, aging
samples are unable to conduct electricity as easily as young
samples.

Chemical properties: Attempts to bond with WO any chance it can get. Also tends to form strong bonds with itself. Becomes explosive when mixed with KD
(Element: CHILDIUM) for prolonged period of time.
Neutralize by saturating with alcohol.

Usage: None
Known: Possibly good methane source. Good samples are able o produce large quantities on command.

Caution: In the absence of WO, this element rapidly
decomposes and begins to smell

2/20/01
I finally managed to give Randy a little help on his stuff. Meanwhile, nothing new on my FC. I may get something done this week, as I am passing on a ski trip with Mike and Brian (SADLY….). Just too damn broke, and under too much pressure to get something going here. Wow, that almighty buck sure takes priority!! Maybe it's just living in California.

YOU KNOW YOU ARE FROM CALIFORNIA WHEN........

1. Your co-worker has 8 body piercings and none are visible...

2. You make over $300,000 and still can't afford a house.

3. You take a bus and are shocked at two people carrying on a conversation in English.

4. Your child's 3rd-grade teacher has purple hair, a nose ring, is named Breeze.

5. You can't remember...is pot illegal?

6. You've been to a baby shower that has two mothers and a sperm donor.

7. You have a very strong opinion about where your coffee beans are grown and can taste the difference between Sumatran and Ethiopian.

8. You know which restaurant serves the freshest arugula.

9. You can't remember.....is pot illegal?

10. A really great parking space can totally move you to tears.

11. A low speed police pursuit will interrupt ANY TV broadcast.

12. Gas costs $1.00 per gallon more than anywhere else in the U.S.

13. A man gets on the bus in full leather regalia and crotchless chaps. You don't even notice.

14. Unlike back home, the guy at 8:30 am at Starbucks wearing the baseball cap and sunglasses who looks like George Clooney IS George Clooney.

15. Your car insurance costs as much as your house payment.

16. Your hairdresser is straight, your plumber is gay, the woman who delivers your mail is into S & M and your Mary
Kay rep is a guy in drag.

17. You can't remember...is pot illegal?

18. It's barely sprinkling rain and there's a report on every news station about "STORM WATCH 2001."

19. You have to leave the big company meeting early because Billy Blanks himself is teaching the 4:00 PM Tae Bo class. 20. You pass an elementary school playground and the children are all busy with their cell phones or pagers.

21. It's barely sprinkling rain outside, so you leave for work an hour early to avoid all the weather-related accidents.

22. Hey!!!! Is Pot Illegal????

23. Both you AND your dog have therapists.

2/22/01
Not only has little been done on the FC, but the computer situation has been aerobically terrible! My wonderful new Imac has had non-stop problems. It MAY be a logic board defect. It's been reformatted twice, and I just added 256 megs of memory. My reward was that it crashed about 10 times in a row. As I'm typing this, it is functioning for right now. Why? Clueless. The printer developer just expired, and I dumped a new $30 toner pack in it thinking that was what was needed. Kiss that goodbye. So my main printer is down waiting for parts, hopefully tomorrow. You ever notice how "hopefully" is one of the main operative words in all these updates?? I do have another HP printer, thankfully, so I'm OK, although it is dramatically slower than the laser printer. American Computer Hardware in Santa Ana is extremely helpful, and the laser printer parts are on their way. This DataProducts printer is on its last laps, as parts are now non-existent for some portions of the unit. I got 7 years out of it, so I can't complain.
Anyway, I got to Industrial Metals yesterday, and bought a lot of square tubing, but not for the race car. It is to build some gates to keep our little doggies alive (and out of the street). More $ and time going to places other than the FC. Work is progressing OK, just not enough of it, and it still feels like battling fiscal infinity.
I had a sobering realization while watching the tragic Dale Earnhardt crash at Daytona. Almost 5 years ago at Vegas, when I nuked my 431" backup motor, and ended my active racing until a few months from now, I was pointing DIRECTLY at the wall at about 140 mph. I now see just how devastating that could have been had I not wiggled the car successfully down the track. I shall tighten my belts a bit more henceforth.
Webmaster Derek also informed me that my MS Front Page program is junk. So trying to wean myself off him to do the site maintenance is now going to require some other program to accomplish this, plus a LOT of training. Jim Maher knows all this only too well in his mighty and successful efforts to develop the CIFCA web site.
As I noted earlier, I had to pass on going skiing today and tomorrow at Mammoth with the boys…just too much fiscal pressure here to do that. Of course, if I waited for solvency to do anything, I'd be catatonic by now. I managed to give Capt Randy a few hours of payback for his years of help. He is making some progress on his car, working on the perimeter body stiffeners using some aluminum. His body is paper-thin and ridiculously light. I spotted some Nomex honeycomb at Industrial Metals that looks like just what he needs to augment some areas of his shell. I'd just use steel plate to keep the weight up….

2/23/01
Tourist walked up to a guard at the White House and said, "I'd like to see President Clinton."
The guard replied that Mr. Clinton was no longer and did not reside at the White House.
The next day the same tourist approached the same guard and said "I'd like to see President Clinton."
The guard replied that Mr. Clinton was no longer president and did not reside at the White House.
The next day the tourist returned again and said "I'd like to see president Clinton."
The guard said, "Look, the day before yesterday, you asked to see President Clinton, and I told you he was no longer president. Yesterday you asked to see President Clinton and again I told you he was no longer President. Why are you back here today asking the same question?
The tourist replied "I just like to hear you say that."

2/23/01
Tomorrow will not see much FC work, but there is the possibility of getting some organization done in the Garage Mahal. As I have deleted most of my slimy work force from last year, I have retained most of my tools. I need to get them all put away. The maddening thing in working on the car is spending silly time looking for things I know are there. Like the tin, for example. It's tough to re-invent an operation and predict all the things you'll need, let alone create a spot for them, let alone GET them. But at this point, I have certainly most of what is required, just not the space for all the stuff. It is a frustrating game of moving piles around. Like the rest of humanity, I'm struggling to make a living while engaged in an enterprise that requires spending a lot of that income. There's just too much outgo and too little income. And with BIG eyes, I've made it that much tougher to get ahead of the game. So be it. This is survivor, only all inside a garage….

2/25/01
The rains have continued to come down BIG time, I've got a maddening small leak from a skylight which we have several times thought we'd cured, and the front sump pump continues to annoy by a variety of means, all resulting in a garage flood. The pump inexplicably stopped over a week ago, then it stopped again this afternoon when the float stuck on some rough concrete in the deep vault. All appears good now (everything imaginable is crossed…).
If I can find some money somewhere tomorrow, I get those batteries and try the starter, etc. on the FC.
And I have a cold, dammit. I NEVER used to get colds. But the last 6 years, I get a lot. Hmmm, could marriage have anything to do with this?
I did some welding practice in, fabricating some doggie gates. I'm 20' short on the small square tubing pickets, and WAY long on the big stuff. Maybe I can return some tomorrow.

A girl was having trouble with her computer.
So she called Tim, the computer guy, over to her desk. Tim clicked a couple buttons and solved the problem. As he was walking away, Joanne called after him, "So, what was wrong?"

And he replied, "It was an ID ten T error."

A puzzled expression ran riot over Joanne's face. "An ID ten T error? What's that ... in case I need to fix it again??"

He gave her a grin... ... "Haven't you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?"
"No," replied Joanne.
"Write it down," he said, "and I think you'll figure it out."

(She wrote...) I D 1 0 T

03/02/2001
While I've got a LOT of FC things to think about, fabricating tin, getting sponsorship, etc, here are some other things to think about, just to get a little perspective:

If we could shrink the earth's population to a village of precisely
100 people, with all the existing human ratios remaining the same, it would look something like the following:

There would be:

57 Asians
21 Europeans
14 from the Western Hemisphere, both north and south
8 Africans

52 would be female
48 would be male

70 would be non-white
30 would be white

70 would be non-Christian
30 would be Christian

89 would be heterosexual
11 would be homosexual

6 people would possess 59% of the entire world's wealth and all 6 would be from the United States.

80 would live in substandard housing
70 would be unable to read
50 would suffer from malnutrition
1 would be near death; 1 would be near birth
1 (yes, only 1) would have a college education
1 would own a computer

When one considers our world from such a compressed perspective, the need for acceptance, understanding and education becomes glaringly apparent.

The following is also something to ponder...
If you woke up this morning with more health than illness...you are more blessed than the million who will not survive this week.

If you have never experienced the danger of battle, the loneliness of imprisonment, the agony of torture, or the pangs of starvation ...you are ahead of 500 million people in the world.
If you can attend a church meeting without fear of harassment, arrest, torture, or death...you are more blessed than three billion people in the world.
If you have food in the refrigerator, clothes on your back, a roof
overhead and a place to sleep...you are richer than 75% of this world.
If you have money in the bank, in your wallet, and spare change in a dish someplace ... you are among the top 8% of the world's wealthy.-I'M NOT IN THIS CATEGORY
If your parents are still alive and still married ... you are very rare, even in the United States and Canada.
If you can read this message, you just received a double blessing in that someone was thinking of you, and furthermore, you are more blessed than over two billion people in the world that cannot read at all.

Someone once said: What goes around comes around.

Work like you don't need the money.
Love like you've never been hurt.
Dance like nobody's watching.
Sing like nobody's listening.
Live like it's Heaven on Earth.

3/6/01
Notwithstanding the above incantations for enlightenment, fiscally, it's hell on earth right now. Boy, could I have used that net 43 million from the Lotto! In reality here, cash flow is absent. Well, there is negative flow, but only a little, since there is nothing with which to pay out. So I am waiting for another job to sign to start the process all over.
Meanwhile, I have scored two sheets of aluminum for the tin work. In these times I keep re-evaluating just what I'm trying to accomplish. So far, I've achieved a high level of indebtedness!!
I've pretty much gone through all the bids, and what is, is. Unfortunately, what is not, is not, and that is where the present difficulty lies. So I may actually have a day to spend cleaning up the work area in the garage, put some things away, enhance my experience of the space I created.
I have re-thought the garage layout, and am going to change it.
As it is, the race car is in the left rear, with the body floating above. So that location is immutable. The trailer is next to it at the right rear. The front two spaces were to be for the dually, in front of the trailer, and my Tbird, at the left front. As it is, there is just a mass of STUFF in the front, including the folded-down saw table. While it does flip up, I still have to move the saw to park the dually. It was for that reason I concreted the front portion of the driveway. It turns out the inspector will not allow a covered shed out there, so I've had to adjust my plan. I'm going to relocate the saw table to the rear, move the trailer to the front spot, and just use the back half of the garage for the workshop and car. When the FC is in the trailer, that will leave room for the dually to be parked inside. As I've disposed of my work truck, and now use the dually for my construction hauling needs, it (regrettably) stays out a lot. This new layout should allow for many more tools of size to have a place, and therefore cut down on the pile and tool shuffling. If the trailer truly will stay forward, I could even create more racks and cabinets on that west side. But for now (remember, no new projects), I'm just going to relocate stuff. The saw table will require being re-hinged at the back, but that's no biggie.
I still have not consummated the bolt crib. While I have gotten numerous discrete components, as needed, I still don't have the final stock of here-it-is stuff. I'll get around to that almost certainly AFTER the car is completely back together. So, out to the Garage Mahal for some create re-stocking.

3/7/01
I'm self-employed (for how much longer is questionable), so the following don't yet apply to me. However, these do echo my general sentiments at this time of X-fiscal Games.

THINGS YOU'D LOVE TO SAY AT WORK, BUT CAN'T...

1 I can see your point, but I still think you're full of shit.
2 I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.
3 How about never? Is never good for you?
4 I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in
public.
5 I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to worship me.
6 I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.
7 I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a Message.
8 I don't work here. I'm a consultant
9 It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word you're saying.
10 Ahhh.....I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again.......
11 I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.
12 You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
13 I have plenty of talent and vision, I just don't give a damn.
14 I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
15 I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.
16 Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.
17 The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.
18 Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.
19 What am I?...Flypaper for freaks??
20 I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.
21 And your cry-baby whiny-butt opinion would be....?
22 Do I look like a people person?
23 This isn't an office, It's hell with fluorescent lighting.
I started out with nothing and still have most of it left.
25 Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.
26 If I throw a stick, will you leave?
27 Errors have been made, Others will be blamed.
28 Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.
29 I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.
30 A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.
31 Can I trade this job for what's behind door #1?
32 Too many freaks, not enough circuses.
33 Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?
34 CHAOS, PANIC, AND DISORDER-my work here is done.
35 How do I set a laser printer to stun?
36 I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks

OK, I DID something! I scored the two Optimas today! I know, big deal. Well, it MAY be a big deal, as these will now allow for the final checking of the electrical. I visited Robert Reehl on Saturday, picking up a spare front drive for the pump and mag. While these are pretty bulletproof, should one fail, that would end the racing for quite a while, as they are pretty hard to come by used. So the $135 for the spare was a good thing. Randy got his, a nicer magnesium unit. I'm quite deep in spares: engine, trans, mag, drives, trans. What we have none to spare is money…
While I was at Reehl's, I stopped in next door and talked with Monty at Hi-Torque Starters. We discussed my 24-volt units, and I realized that I had been trying to trigger the starters with 12 volts. The starters are actually quite capable of handling 12 or 24 volts with no modification. He had just upped the solenoids in case they were being fed 24 volts. It was unnecessary in retrospect. But they are what they are. That is easily corrected by just tapping off the 24 volts right on the starter and re-routing the starter switch wire from there, and should allow for a proper test of function. They HAVE to be OK, they're both fresh. More than I can say for my brain……..I should check with Brad at Precision Products (shifter) to confirm the neutral safety switch can handle 24 volts as well. If not, a solenoid can be added to handle that.
I will need to do some soul-searching before commencing the tin fabrication. For about $600, I could score the shear, bead roller, and brake necessary to work the stuff. But, no gotta da dough. So I will either have to improvise, or wait, or borrow someone's.
Hey, I just had a flash for a sponsor: how about a bankruptcy attorney? Now racing is THE place for a guy like that!!!

3/9/01
Collected a few pittance today. Normally, this would be reasonable $, but under the circumstances, it is chump change (I'm the chump). I did some work yesterday, and got paid today….I like that. I collected the full amount of a judgment from the mom of the defendant today, a welcome close to the unpleasant screwing I took on "being a nice guy." Naturally, the clone Tbird ate up some of that money to replace two mufflers (not by choice). Super nice guy Bob Huth gave me a sweet deal, and I do sincerely appreciate it. If you're in the LA area and need ANY muffler-related work, this is THE guy, hands down @ 818-345-4755. He's been there his whole life! Really.
The Condor still sits, and looks more and more like a walkway project. I HATE that idea. The Gremlin is supposedly done, just waiting to be detailed by Chinto. I have web ads on both cars (but no photos yet), and I must attend to that. No calls on either as yet.
Everyplace I go I get the same question: "So, you got the car running yet?" My answer: "I've been two weeks away for about 8 months…"
Going to go to the March Meet tomorrow at Famoso (Bakersfield). At least I'll SEE some guys doing the dance. Head wizard Mike Kirby is there with his twin-six dragster and his roadster, so perhaps I'll see someone running 7.50's on the Nostalgia Eliminator index. Don't know if Jim Scott will attend, but that would be nice. And of course there will be lotsa cars in the walkway on display, always a treat.
3/12/01
Well, no treat this weekend. I passed on Famoso, stayed home and built two doggie gates. My wife is happy, as she feels secure for the little critters now. The starter needs to be put back in the FC. But I'll check both of them first, before setting it in.
Slimeball Dave Smith appears to be continuing his idiocy, and has not covered his payment to me on his screwing of me on the Condor. His check is due to be good Wednesday, and no funds as yet in his account to cover. There's more to it, but the DA is already filing a default on him and setting a court date to enter his stipulated judgment. He's a major jerk, and I'm just continuing to struggle with money, based on stuff just like this.
The next three days should prove interesting, if not rewarding.

3/13/01
Our slimeball himself called me, and now promises to hand deliver my dough on Thursday. Any bets, ladies and gentlemen? Spent some time in the garage last night, putting away lots of tools, and doing some wiring. I mounted the primer pump and got it wired, and it works. Did a little work on the spark plug wiring routing and lacing, and connected the batteries. The Auto Meter shift module clicks when the power is connected. I'll have to check into what this means. It appears to set a relay or something, and ANYTHING that moves gets my attention. So far, no smoke. Oddly, though, the shifter trans brake control does not work. The neutral safety switch is functioning, so there is power to the shifter. My understanding is the trans brake switch works off the 12-volt line power that is always at the shifter. Found a problem with the Parker Pumper power line: there was no power at the fuse box for that circuit. Strangely, there is a tab for jumper across the bottom of the fuse block. I recall there being a power leg there, which I removed, thinking it was redundant. NOT! I jumpered it and it's fine now. I did not get the starter installed, nor did I try either one last night. Perhaps later today. I got a chance to use my new Hako ultra trick soldering station. Wow, it DOES make a difference to have a $200 tool!! I'm pressing forward with two major themes (aside from struggling for liquidity): getting the beast to light, and relocating the trailer in the garage. I'll need to get the oil pressure sender connected, and I'd like to have the oil temp gauge function. For that, I need a threaded adapter for the pan. A benefit of relocating the trailer will be some appreciated room around the FC for working on it. It is a bit tight as it is right now. It's OK, but hey, why not have it even better?
Another benefit might be to get Randy's car in here for some maintenance or outright work. He got a little accomplished last week, and perhaps in a couple of weeks he might be poised to do some more. It is certain that neither of us will make the April opener at Sacramento. Oh, it's possible I could make it, but VERY unlikely. The car is still unpainted, and the tin work is yet to be done. I'll say my new goal is to have it ready by my birthday on June 9th.

3/19/01
Slimeball did not make it, despite his assurances he would. Now he claims he'll be here today. Fat chance! We have no new work we can commence at this moment. I am waiting on a check to commence about $4400 of work, but nothing has arrived, so no start until money is in hand.
Did a little cleanup around the yard, cutting the grass for the first time in about a year. It has been cut VERY occasionally by others. The mower broke AGAIN. This damn thing breaks gears about every 5 minutes. Incredibly stupid design. I will now write to the manufacturer for relief, as the repair facility likely will not honor it again, aside from their phone being disconnected….
Randy is dropping by in a few minutes to look over the latest, and perhaps give a slight hand in re-arranging the garage to the "improved" configuration.

3/20/01
Well, we really did some work today, at least on the garage. Relocated the saw to the back, tossed a bunch of wood, put some stuff away, cleaned the place out using dust-control (moist sawdust), blew the place out, and relocated the trailer to the front, put some tools along the eat wall. Oh, and rolled the race car back under the body. So other than a mess of stuff at the front left of the garage, it is pretty darn good. The land line power cord from the trailer now does not reach the dedicated plug on the west wall, so I'll need to make an extension there, or remake the cord longer. We also worked on the furniture that another idiot broke. Man, can I pick 'em! As you may recall from a couple of months ago, I gave Frank Mastro, major jerkoff, a grand deposit on a $2K reupholstery job on five pieces. I spent about a grand having them refinished and some broken areas repaired. Idiot picks them up, breaks two pieces, doesn't do the work, doesn't return the stuff. So now I'm down about $1500 with nothing accomplished, plus I paid to refinish the stuff. I'm getting a friend to locate the materials I selected, and I've lined up a reputable upholsterer through her to do the work. But first, a few more days repairing the repairs.
And, slimeball called again promising he'd be here tomorrow at 11 AM. We really should get a pool going on my web site! Ed and I worked nicely together today. The stuff always goes better when I'm in it, doing it, directing it. Sorta like driving the race car.
And good news on the $4400 job: they sent the checks today, to arrive tomorrow. We'll get right on it with materials procurements and drilling thousand of holes prior to going to the job site to assemble our work.
All is not good: a dear friend of ours from before I was born died yesterday at 87. What a sweetheart. Mary, you'll be missed, big time.
And in a bit of balance, met a friend from the past (27 years ago) for lunch. Interesting to see both ends of the life spectrum.
The next week or two is very critical cash flow wise. The temptation is to bogard the up front money from the job and pay bills. Can't do that. Just gotta stay calm and get the work completed to get the rest.
Ordered 10 pulleys and 75' of 3/16" cable from Grainger to create a winch system for the camper shell, ala the FC body sling, but without the motorized winch. This will allow for the shell to be up out of the way per my description of a while back, free MORE floor space (!), protect it from moving damage (it is 9' long and 5' wide), and allow for a fairly easy on and off the truck at will. I'll opt for a hand crank for this.
The revised layout is a big improvement, but will require a bit of rewiring here and there. It also affords the opportunity to put more cabinets on the west wall above the saw. There is about 22 feet of wall space that could be utilized for such storage. And with the saw and table below, these cabinets will have good access, while being up and out of the way. Tiny Ed Anctil is excited about all he is learning, and we'll undoubtedly have some fun building cabinets, too. He wants to learn everything. If I had 3 more of him, I could make a living.
We moved the aluminum sheets outside to avoid damage and allow our work. They're fine for now under the west overhang.
The saw table will afford a rather large work bench area for working on that aluminum. See, better already!

Here are few interesting quotes to close out update #25:

"I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with 'Guess' on it. I said,
'Thyroid problem?'"--Arnold Schwarzenegger

"Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that you're in." --Courtney Cox (Monica on "Friends")
Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps."
--Tiger Woods

"I read somewhere that 77 per cent of all the mentally ill live in poverty. Actually, I'm more intrigued by the 23 percent who are apparently doing quite well for themselves."
Jerry Garcia (Grateful Dead)

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