Funny Car Updates #13 10/3/99 - 12/15/99   

10/7/99
Everything is STILL in the middle of the garage. Why hasn’t the junk left on its own? I mean, the GOOD tools and equipment just disappear, why not the junk?
My typing is dyslexic, owing mainly to the 5 Krispy Kreme donuts I just had. Like bodies, they’re best when warm. Jason has fabbed up the wood wedges and plates for the pulleys. The mistakenly ordered 12 volt winch has been returned, and the wood blocks have been stained to match the finished wood everywhere else. The Condor (the BIG-motored Tbird) is about to get the heads bolted down, lifters installed, and pushrods placed (is there an echo?). I think I’m 2-3 days from actually getting the thing back together and functional. Let’s see if it’s NOT 3 days of Sundays. The fall winds have hit, and the air is inspiring, to turn a phrase. Must be the negative ions (REALLY!). The largest bit of progress is that I’m about to write a check for 8 seats at the CIFCA banquet, basically my entry fee to get made fun of by the indefatigable “Pistol Pete” Mauriello. His own Vega polished-to-the-bone Rodeck-powered FC is a lesson in tenacity and long-term commitment. He was off longer than I have been, and his garage is still WAY worse. His level of perfectionism and polish is what I’m using as a bench mark. It’s a VERY tall bench. His garage lesson speaks for itself.
The disuse of my equipment has taken its toll on the Powercaster, the electric-powered trailer caddy I use to move the 5-ton trailer behemoth around. It has two 8” wheels to carry the (at least) ton of tongue weight and move the 10,000# of trailer around. One Powercaster tire keeps going flat, NOT a good thing. In attempting to remove the axle and wheels to repair the tire, the bearings fell out (the axle was rusted to the bearings, and  just would NOT let go). So, down to El Monte, and for $50 all is new and wonderful. Hopefully, it will last more than another 5 years since from now on it will reside INSIDE. I am, OF COURSE, the FIRST person ever to have this problem with their unit. Ask me if I’m surprised. They were actually quick, wonderful and inexpensive about the repair. Sort of a QWIKFIX.
I’ve been gently probing Nick to get on the paint job, so I can get the inspiration to get moving on the project. No matter, until the pulleys are done, it’s moot. After humping back to El Monte for the Powercaster, tomorrow will see me hanging plumb lines, cutting drywall open, drilling the wood mounting plates, and hopefully ACTUALLY setting the pulleys in place. The always-thinking Captain Laur has recommended we set the winch about 7’ high on the back wall, out of the way. As it has a remote control on a tether, that’s just fine. It also hopefully puts it RIGHT on top of the wood backing I set in the wall before drywalling.
One minor setback: the welding shop up the street has closed, so I’m going to have to go a couple of blocks further to get my welding done, back to the tough-as-nails Ajax Welding. They are versatile, do sandblasting and farm out powder coating, and warped my Turbo 400 case several years ago.
I may call Hank Landy, nephew of Dick Landy (and son of Hank Landy, Sr. from whom I got my clone Tbird) to do some welding. And he’s mobile to boot. I also need to weld the engine changer to the steel rafter, and he’s the man who made the rafter piece originally. As previously noted, all these parts are MUCH more compact when assembled.
Qwik thought: What hair color do they put on the driver's license of a bald man?

10/8/99
Just checked into the CIFCA wb site for the season finale results. Damn, we WILL be there next season!!

10/9/99
The Powercaster was actually $61, still wonderful. The winch and pulleys are UP. Unfortunately there was NO backing behind the south wall winch and upper pulley location, so I had to open up the beautifully finished wall, install backing, and do what we must. More work for Rogelio, master drywall taper. The alignments are good, and the cable runs well. Monday will see Randy return, and I’ll look forward to getting the bunching attachment from him and making this thing fully functional. Looks simple, but was far from it after laying it out and doing it. Ain’t that the racing way?

10/10/99
Put up a couple more pulleys to act as guides for the longer cable runs. The system looks to be sweet. Now the next step is to see what to do with Randy’s body. Maybe just leaving his featherweight Probe in his trailer would be the easiest, unlike my King Tut pyramid-weight smoothed Tbird body. I put a call into Pete Mauriello to offer some grist for his deprecation mill, but he’s not taken me up on my offer to provide some M for his S (his S/M diatribes at the banquet).
Qwik thought: When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?

OTHER NEWS
Gene Christensen has relocated his Auto-Rite transmission shop to 20952 Sherman Way in Canoga Park.
His phone is now  818-251-9696.
He will attend the CIFCA banquet again this year as my guest.
He is SO busy!
Tuned up the winch system, after pulling the front pulley out of the wall TWICE!. Man, that little puppy takes ALL the lifting force. We finally settled on backing BEHIND the wall framing, and 4 threaded rods through 4 layers of wood. It would have to pull the wall out. Looks real good now. Let’s see, I guess I should get the body here so I can USE it, eh?
We’re doing a little more drywall and paint tuning in the garage, sanding the trailer floor (it’s 2” thick oak), and moving all the stuff endlessly around in the garage. Actually, my rentor in the front is sleeping in the garage, as we’re doing the house flooring as well, and we’ve had to be out for three days.
We’re sleeping in the office and/or kitchen. The tough part is three days without TV!! ‘Course, that forces me off the couch and up to get things done, like this newsletter.
Randy dropped by this morning and nicely mounted the RCD blower belt guard. Pricey little thing, and beautiful.  Hank Landy has not yet made it here to assess the engine-pulling beam he’ll weld in, nor the trailer transformer bracket.

10/26/99
Landy did get by about a week ago, and was to have done 3 items last week. So far, no show. Mr. Welder was to: procure and mount the 6” by 8’ long I-beam, fabricate the 10 kilowatt step-up transformer bracket for the trailer (to allow use of the 220-volt air conditioner and a welder in the field), and construct the 3’ x 2’ steel plate to block off the garage floor access to the underfloor area of the house (required for fire code). I’ve left some messages, but no luck as yet.
The floors are DONE. The trailer floor is also done, and looks great! We’re moved back in, and the transformation to clean has inspired Millie to go on a cleaning rampage. We’re attempting NOT to re-introduce junk into the house. Therefore, the garage is chock full of junk to be tossed. So far, I’ve dumped two truckloads and many City trash cans full of stuff. It just takes some building of momentum to throw things away. Everything in there has some potential value. Sadly, as I’ve said before, I’ve spent tens of thousands of dollars storing tens of dollars of parts for over ten years. Certainly, I’ll find a use for something only after I’ve tossed it. The day-to-day cost of that potential use is astronomical. Just ask Pete Mauriello. His entire garage is literally bulging with potential value.
Nick Johns, Mr. Paint, said he’d come by this week and show me what to do on the body in prep for him priming, blocking, and final painting the thing (never happened).
I’m looking for a half dozen attractive D-rings for the trailer, as the old ones don’t cut it in the lovely floor.
The body floats at over 7’ clear above the floor, so working below is a breeze. I am intending to throw the engine and trans in later this week (ha!). Of course the overhead engine hoist would be nice, but I’ll use the cherry picker for now.
Randy plans to bring his chassis and engine over next week (ha!). This will be a momentous occasion.
Mauriello has still not called, so it’s his loss. Meanwhile, the Garage Mahal is shaping up nicely. The goal for this weekend is to get the trailer back inside (ha!). In order to find room for the massive arrary of STUFF and to clear the floor, we’ve erected a 12’ section of storage on the east wall to house the major construction tools, relocated 15 LF of storage to the rear of the guest house, and found some long-missing stuff in the process. Many parts of the car are emerging from the mountains of things.
The body sling was a point of concern: we didn’t know just exactly what the head clearance for  working underneath was going to be. I had thoughts of having to open up the roof and provide more space. As it turned out, I retrieved the body from Hamricks unpainted, and it is now floating blissfully in the rafters of the garage on the Superwinch system. I’ll need to fabricate some wheelwell pads, but so far just hooking the cable ends onto the body tree works well. Randy Laur rightly suggested some safety lanyards be added in case of a pulley failure. Excellent thinking.  We’re considering putting some inserts in the stiffening ribs of the body and pulling from the top side. For now, we’ll hold with this. I’m also going to add some foam pads to the right side in case of a good earthquake, so as not to bang on the wall (NOTE:  We had a 3.2 shasker, but no problem).
Once all this is done, think how boring these updates could be: Raced, won several rounds, car went straight, cleaned things up, set valves, raced again two weeks later. You know how much I ACHE for such boredom?
Meanwhile, the future plans for the operation include putting a two-tone epoxy finish on the floor, getting glass and door hardware in two doors for security (Randy doesn’t want anyone futzing with his stuff-does this guy have great thinking or what?), and getting the AC system connected in the garage.

10/29/99
We’ve spent the last weeks chasing money, and we snared some today, and landed a $20K job for Monday! Hooray! Actual WORK AND PEOPLE WHO LIKE US! While nice, it’s not enough to get above zero, not by $50K or so, but every bit helps. We’ve spent these last days constructing cabinets for the garage. We’re actually getting stuff off the floor! There was a brief nano-second where I thought I would have to SEARCH for things to fill the shelves!! In my dreams!  We’ve drywalled the storage area above the rear portion of the garage, fire-taped some areas (our VERY particular NEW inspector is making it tougher than our darling previous wonderboy), wiring the intercoms for final function, and enjoying the car body hanging from the ceiling. We got the hardware and deadbolt on the rear side door, and Monday we’ll go for the front access door (for Randy’s security, remember?).
Actually, this will mark the first time in years that I will be able to lock up my tools, and lock up the trailer in the garage. This is GOOD.
I may end up building a false front across all the cabinets and putting finished doors over the whole thing, which would be MUCH easier than starting the shelving gig all over (translation: TOO much money to begin from scratch). I’m considering sliding doors for REAL ease of operation. Hey, they work great in the trailer, why not in the Garage Mahal?
We’re finding little bits and pieces as more items come off the floor and onto the shelving. After a really long spell of enormous inertia and zero momentum, I have gotten rolling again in the workshop area. It really has been quite a transformation from just dirt and enormous piles of stuff in December of last year to an enclosed, just-about-finished 1100 SF spectacular space today and just enormous piles of stuff. We also moved about 12 tons of dirt from the side yard to lower it sufficiently for code compliance (must be 6” below interior finished grade). I’ll get some sand and gravel over the area to eliminate mud, and MAYBE steal some of today’s largesse and put concrete down and have SOMETHING finished before the rains turn it to a bog.
Handy Hank Landy is scheduled to be here Monday to install the engine hoist beam, etc. Stay tuned.
 

11/3/99-late evening
Handy Hank has scheduled himself for Saturday morning, and had forgotten about one part of the project. We nailed down the specs on the hoist beam, roof pitch, drop, overhang, etc. See? There IS a lot of technical detail to all this stuff.
Now, if I had 3 times the garage size, then:
1-Some of these excruciatingly tight fits wouldn’t be critical,
2-I’d probably be just as anal anyway,
3-I’d need only ANOTHER twice as big a garage for all of Pete Mauriello’s crap.
I spent another evening cutting yet more shelving and developing blood blisters from pushing clips into the shelving (no kidding). I keep massaging the garage, much like the Qwik Dick odyssey. It really is taking shape, and it’s not only rewarding to see tool boxes all lined up the wall, each in its own designated shelf and pocket, but it’s already paying off in being able to grab just the item I need, and not spending a half hour searching the rubble for the thing I KNOW is there, somewhere, then having to buy a second or third one. It also provides a telltale HOLE when an item is gone, as opposed to stacking all the tools boxes together willy-nilly to save space, then not knowing what’s missing, and therefore triggering duplication or worse. I resisted the urge to spend $ today, at least on more tools. I see clearly that it IS a compulsion (like the racing is not?), although one grounded fairly logically in reality: I DO need tools. Of course, I ALSO need a positive cash flow, and it is maddening to have to dribble only a precious few dollars toward huge projects yet undone. You, of course, know this feeling all too well. What’s scary is that I’ve pulled in about $15K in the last week, and it’s just NOTHING in the big scheme of things. Argghh!!!
Had another hit of reality today: Varo Yeretzian, my extremely cordial and wonderful friend and crackerjack wrought iron fabricator died of a heart attack two days ago at 50 years old. So I do acknowledge that I am VERY lucky to have a race car project to struggle and complain about.
Aside from massaging the tools and STUFF, I’ve firmly decided to alter the attachment points of the hoist system to the body. Succinctly (yeah, right!), I’ll drill some holes in the hood and rear portion of the top in line with the front and rear axles (about a foot in from each side of the body), and set nuts on brackets or plates under the front hood stiffening rib and on the rear aluminum bulkhead (not normally found in funnycars). I’ll set hood pin escutcheons to surround the holes, and thread large EYE-bolts into them, slide a rod (actually a 3/4” pipe) through the eyes , and therefore allow the pulleys to pull straight up (to avoid torquing the body and developing cracks).
Captain Randy is having it a bit tough right now. His dad, an incredible 83 year-old, is struggling with multiple system problems. This is a guy who was still running up on his roof until 18 months ago, and now can’t make it across the room. I’ve been there about 8 years ago with my dad, and my heart goes out to Randy, who astoundingly continues to make time to help me.
I have committed to getting the 76 x 3 walkway along the garage and office completed BEFORE the rains hit. How’s that for a change? We lugged out a full dumpster of dirt, have set forms today, are making some adjustments to the drains and sump pump pits already in place, will set rebar tomorrow along with a couple more tons of gravel base, and hopefully have the concrete in by the next entry in this VERY long update (the smoking keyboard is a substitute for smoking slicks). At this rate this update may weigh in about like the car body!
 

WEB COMMUNICATION
It is VASTLY quicker and cheaper for me to forward this to you by e-mail or FAX. I’m including a card with this update asking several things, among them a FAX # and/or an e-mail address to expedite future missives. I WILL get a web page at some point in the evolution of cash flow, and then you can just check in whenever you like. Meanwhile, there’s e-mail.

11/8/99
Just to show you how the best of intentions are NOT always enough: the walkway is formed, rebar laying ready to tie, spacer blocks stacked and ready, drains reset and re-connected, tons of gravel and sand base in place, forms in, concrete ordered, and BINGO, freak storm dumps rain on LA. Why should this be different?
Hank Landy DID show up Saturday at noon, and all went quickly and well. The 8’ long I-beam is welded and bracketed in place, the trolley system is assembled and on the beam, the 3-ton chain hoist is untangled and hanging from the trolley, the crawl hole cover is in and secured, and the trailer 175-pound transformer bracket (the transformer weighs that, not just the bracket!) is done. I drilled the trailer studs out for bolts, but all the bolts I had were just about 1/4” short of safe. So ten bolts and nuts from now it will be in place. Once the fit is good, I’ll take it down and paint it and reinstall it for good. THEN, I can get the electricians back to wire it once and for all, and get power back into the trailer. I spent 12 hours on Sunday doing the intricate drywall repairs on the second half of the steel garage rafter cover (required for fire code-can you believe structural steel is NOT considered fireproof?), and around the I-beam supports. My drywall guy complimented me today on my fine work (maybe he needs money!).
Last night’s freak rain did have one annoying effect on the trailer: the 2 old skylights (now covered on the interior with paneling) were NOT covered on top. So, at 6:49 AM this morning, in my robe and bare feet, I was up on the roof of the trailer covering them up in the rain.  Ah, the glamorous world of funnycar racing!
Capt Laur dropped by today, and we brainstormed the lift attachments on the body and some other thoughts. He suggested some refinements and I agree. So, out came the drill motor and bingo! 2 holes in the hood. Hank Landy has agreed to let me come to his place tomorrow night, bring what I need, and he’ll make the attachment plates up there.
At Laur’s suggestion I will look for someone to shoot a chop gun coat of glass on the underside of the body. I will be going to a dark Zolotone color, to help mask the inevitable dirt and oil. I will look for a silicone coating to make it easier to keep clean, though. Randy is urging me to just strip the frame and get it powder-coated. I’m still debating, as I don’t want to have to destroy it with any welding changes. Really, I just need to refit the tin. There are no other tabs I can think of at the moment that need changing.
One thing that might need work is the header cutouts on the body. I had last run the short deck motor (dumpster fodder after the piston exited stage left 3 years ago), and now have two tall deck motors. So the header clearance could very well be inadequate. No big, as it’s not painted. See, something good from all the delay. It just requires setting the motor in, which HEY, I can do now that the hoist is in. Co-incidentally, a friend just borrowed the cherry picker. He’s welcome to it for a long time (at this point such generosity just clears up more floor space).
The front door glass is due anytime, to finally seal the Garage Mahal in. Also due tomorrow morning is the building inspector, to hopefully sign off the stucco lathing and drywall. He needed all the fire wall stuff done in the garage before returning (you remember all this, right?).  Hopefully, he’ll be a happy camper. Should that be so, I’ll hopefully not see him again until final inspection.
The marble guy has delayed starting for two days. As typical, we cleared the area for him today in anticipation of tomorrow’s commencement. The plumber has also basically been blowing me off for the last month on a day to day basis (again, great intentions). He promises to be here tomorrow. So we may see the toilet, bidet, tub, water heaters, and maybe even the garage sink functioning, not to mention finally connecting the entire copper repipe under the house within a few days. Of course, according to Pete Mauriello, those are just the plumbing items on the funnycar!
Speaking of plumbing, I REALLY wanted to kick the CRAP out of PacBell today. They basically extorted me into paying $345 for a phone bill I didn’t do, almost 4 years ago! They just popped up out of the blue and said we’re disconnecting your phone if you don’t pay, and they did! I’ll spare you the FCC-mandated stuff, and just say they have some VERY unprofessional people processing this stuff (and a VERY few nice ones). In what was to be typical of the whole ordeal, I went to the PacBell office, only to find it closed, in contradiction to big signs on the window saying it would be closed permanently on Dec 18th (only 5 weeks early!). From there I spent all afternoon on hold for up to 20 minutes at a time, and incessant re-dials while standing at a Cambio/Payment center in a Latino market! The forms had to be redone twice, “oh you need a SEPARATE customer digit and file number for this” (more calls to San Diego), etc..... The clerk was astounded at all the trouble PacBell was having processing this, even AFTER the payment was made! What should have been about a 45-second deal (under extreme protest prior to me going there) became hours of further ballistic frustration. I was close to postal. I rewarded myself for resisting phone-a-cide with a stop at Krispy Kreme Donuts on the way home. Hey, it reminds me of getting a funnycar back on the track!
Question: Which is the other side of the street?

11/16/99
OK, the inspector signed us off, and will return only at the very end of the job for his final inspection. Hank Landy kindly donated the fabrication of the body anchor pieces in two hours (amazing what it takes to make four little pieces, even with all the right tools and equipment). Boy, does he have some nice tools, and talent. I’ve partially  mounted the anchors, and am dialing in the installation. I still need to locate a crimping tool to make cable ends, etc. The Pomona Finals were inspirational, explosive, and sadly deadly. I am SO glad we’re not running THOSE categories!! Didn’t really run across any bargains there.
Mounted the transformer (what a BEAST!) in the trailer. Looks great. Now to get Tony Long here to do the final wiring of the 220-volt hookup so I can plug the trailer in, fire up the AC, and be done with that.
I need to seal up the old skylight holes in the trailer roof, as more rain is coming. Of course, backing the thing into the garage might be an idea! There is STILL tons of crap to move out. Laur will be bringing his chassis over next week sometime (ha!). We completed the concrete and stone walkway along the west side of the garage and office, all 76 feet of it. Looks great, makes sense, looks like it was always there. It would now be appropriate for the gutter guy to return and set the downspouts, eh? In the office, the computer has had to be completely wiped clean and reformatted, a two day deal. This is not fun. And if that isn’t enough of a pain in the neck, I have a pinched nerve on the left side of my neck that really IS. I think I tweaked it moving a scaffold or something, and it’s been grinding on me for over a week, even with LOTS of Advil, and a visit to the chiro yesterday (that did help for a few hours). No wonder they call it dis-ease. Yikes.
All of which is to illustrate that wrenching on the car can be a wrenching experience requiring a huge project be completed first. And that is a pain in the neck.

11/18/99
Surrogate son David Sider forwarded to me these "ANAGRAMS".  To quote David, first a little palindrome : a RACE CAR backwards is still a RACE CAR.
Now some anagrams...
An anagram, as you all know, is a word or phrase made by rearranging the
letters of another word or phrase. The following are exceptionally clever.
Someone out there either has way too much time to waste or is deadly at
Scrabble.

Word                        When you rearrange the
                                 letters
------------------------------------------------------
Dormitory                 Dirty Room
Desperation              A Rope Ends It
The Morse Code        Here come Dots
Slot Machines           Cash Lost in 'em
Animosity                 Is No Amity
Mother-in-law         Woman Hitler
Snooze Alarms          Alas! No More Z's
Alec Guinness            Genuine Class
Princess Diana          End Is A Car Spin

AND HERE IS THE MOST INTRIGUING ONE
Year Two Thousand               A Year To Shut Down

11/19/99
The neck FINALLY eased up today. Whew! Tried to set the engine in the car on Wednesday when step-son Michael came over to crew. He wants to set a regular day to work on the car. Now we’re talkin’. Greg has my hoist chain (and cherry picker), so no could do! Of course, Greg’s phone is disconnected. I can’t wait to be able to put everything INSIDE, lock the damn place, and go right to where every tool is, instead of this maddening literally City-wide chase for tools and equipment borrowed with or without my knowledge.
I DID go view the artwork for the Garage Mahal door glass, which will be ready a week from now. Sweet. The bath door glass was ready, so I just installed it. What a concept: pick it up, put it in. No maddening storing it for two years outside, moving it two dozen times, to then have it break (like my vanity marble slab). Found a few more pieces of the FC, so the putzing around the other night was beneficial. We’re down to two main piles of junk to off in the garage. One is predominately Millie’s Christmas and other stuff, the other is misc stuff of mine to be heaved. Well, there also is the 60’ or so of the menagerie piled OUTSIDE against the west fence, too. Hell!
We got a scratch coat (first coat of stucco) on most of the house today, with more to come on Monday. Come Sunday, after the Saturday night CIFCA banquet, I’ll make a Herculean effort to move stuff around and get the trailer in, if only for the exercise.

11/21/99
Spent several hours today moving micro amounts of stuff. Every little thing has a place, (or SHOULD). To pick up something and have to then create a place for it, makes things go SLOWLY. The neck went back into spasm later on Friday, and seems to have eased off a bit now after two more days of disgust (and loads of muscle relaxants). The CIFCA banquet last night was wondrous, with Pariah Pete at his usual insulting best. He set the tone with His very first remark being about me, but cautioning it might be the last. A dozen ribs or so later it was clear he’d had bigger plans. Randy and I are now more committed than ever to make it a Force-like 1-2 finish next season, and it doesn’t matter which one of us is first. I spent some time talking to Mike Hilsabeck, 4-time champion, about some little nuances he’s been working on. This guy never stops tinkering with his operation. He has some very sound strategies. The weather is utterly gorgeous today, cool, crisp, clear, and inspiring. Randy is planning on getting his rig down here within the week (ha!). I retrieved my hoist chain from Greg, so I’m ready to lift the #1 bullet off its stand and actually put a wrench to a real part of the funnycar. Gene Christensen is still hunting for some long dowel pins for our glides, so I can’t set the trans in just yet. I did NOT get the trailer inside.

11/24/99
Just to show you how everything takes time: we’re still trying to snare 4 pairs of long dowels. Christensen just called back and he has secured them, finally!

11/26/99
John is on the way over to secure the dowel pins. This will free me up to assemble the transmissions to the engines, and drop a unit in in one feel swoop. Given the neck problems, this is a good idea. Capt Laur is on his way over after his Thanksgiving Day shift, and we’ll strategize loading the engine into his car, and moving his chassis over here.
The ever-reluctant plumber, Dave Woolum, finally got over here and put two days into completing the plumbing here, with a few minor mishaps (a fitting blew off, and there were no valves on two pipes) as we went. The stucco is 2/3 done, with a few spots of brown coat to be done, and then a final color coat to pass final inspection. We’re going to relocate the garage sink today, hook up the final sump pump, and troubleshoot another pump that blows a breaker (I have THREE sump pumps). Dave is SO busy, and it’s great that he finally got here. Tony Long, the electrician, came over Monday to attempt to finally wire the transformer in the trailer. No luck. We had 220-volts on one side of the panel, zero on the other. What is wrong here?

11/27/99
Today is Gene Christensen’s grand opening party at his relocated Auto-Rite Transmissions Center in Woodland Hills. Notwithstanding his busy schedule, he is prodding me mercilessly to get the FC done and get out on the track. This guy LOVES to race. Randy came by yesterday on his last day before being away for 10 days, after which he is planning on getting his beast in the garage. We were going to hoist the engine/trans in to the frame, but found we needed some air, and, of course, the compressor had been disconnected while stuccoing the exterior. Per usual, we needed some electrical fittings to reconnect the compressor in another spot, so off the Home Depot. By the time we did that, checked on one of my jobs, and got back, Randy had to run to his parents place. So many little things to get this juggernaut operation done. I’ll work on the plugs today, get some air later, and get going on the install of the motor. Randy pointed out that one of my converters may be at risk having had the top open to dust for an extended period of time. I’ll take it to Gene and ask his opinion. Worst case is I’ll send it to Chris at Continental for a refurb.  Mind tickler: Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

11/29/99
Gene’s open house party on Saturday was cool. There were some VERY nice folks in attendance, and a few hot cars to ogle.  Brought the converter along, and Gene felt it was OK, but said he’d do a thorough washing of it.
I have gathered e-mail addresses on more people, so this edition should go out much more easily. Did a little work on the CONDOR-Windsor/Bird, and kinda screwed up. I drilled out the 20 head bolt washers (which were too tight to work), and dutifully oiled the threads and washers, THEN remembered that Randy had mentioned some bolts penetrate water passages and should be SEALED. I called Don Barrington today who gave me the hot tip of applying Teflon paste to the threads and under the heads of the bolts, and not to sweat the oil. During the stucco process, we had to disconnect the external 6 hp 60-gallon compressor, so I did some rewiring of the 220-volt cords, made a humongous 220 extension cord, put ends on Randy’s welder and the compressor, and hooked the air up inside. I was worried, as it ran and ran and ran and couldn’t get over 80 pounds. I finally traced some leaks to a bad end on one of the the 9 wall outlets, another bad end on a hose, but most importantly NO end on the OUTSIDE connection (duh!). That certainly helped. Recouping the air allowed the removal of the Bird bolts in about 2 minutes as opposed to the 10 minutes it took to hand tighten them previously.
I set the roller lifters in, dropped in the pushrods, and now notice the pushrods are TOO damn short. And these are the ones called out by Isky at Crane. I’ll see about this boondoggle tomorrow. It’s going on ONE year since that Bird ran, and I’m beyond pissed. I’ve heard nothing from the BAR regarding the jerk who perpetrated this whole scenario, they just state they are “working on it.” I’ve got a judgement for $5K on this creep, and it looks like I’ll have to go it alone on the collection as well, notwithstanding their suggestions they’ll get my money as part of a plea bargain.
However, that pales in comparison to the over 3 years for the FC. I will move to get the 9” converter set on the Coan glide tonight or tomorrow, get the #1 motor off the stand and on the hoist chain, and get the units bolted together (now that we have the dowels in place). Setting it in the chassis should be the easiest part (ha!). I WILL have to set the front pulley on, and set the blower idler in place in order to bolt together the front mounting plate. My wonderful step-son Mike is having eye surgery tomorrow, so MAY not be up for the Wednesday crew night. We’ll see, so to speak.

11/30/99
Mikey is doing fine, but no crew work for a while. The pushrod debacle sparked an entirely NEW scenario with an old problem: the phone company. I went to call Crane to find out what length pushrod is proper for the Tbird. My phone was not permitted access to long distance! I spent two hours solidly on the phone to every extension, voice mail, etc in the ATT and PacBell networks, and finally stumbled upon the real reason: PacBell had disconnected my phone about 3 weeks ago because of a 4-year old bill not of my doing, remember? They failed to reconnect my long distance service, notwithstanding their assurances ALL was back on line in about an hour! It is stuff like this that brings up the horrible specter of just how far down the  line we are in the techno ladder. Later I found out ANOTHER reason, ATT is now billing SEPARATELY for their services, notwithstanding the disclaimer right on the PacBell bill that they are billing ATT as a courtesy. So, another $72 by phone check and that mess is finally cleared up. To get to a human was nearly impossible! ‘Course no problem like that for you, you have twelve pages here of VERY human ramblings about a VERY hands-on deal. Anyway, the pushrod deal is that they screwed up and I have to return my 6.375” units for the proper 7.9” items to Jeg’s, at which point they’ll order the RIGHT units, credit my credit card with the difference, and ship them out. So much for getting the Big Bird running soon.
Ever wonder  what root beer really is? Beer is a word with two meanings. It can mean an alcoholic beverage made from cereal grains, or a non-alcoholic beverage flavored by root extracts. Root beer, birch beer and ginger beer are three common forms of this sort of beer. In the case of root beer, the flavoring comes from the root of the sassafras tree
or the sarsaparilla vine. Originally the root was brewed like a tea to make an
extract, but now it is much easier to buy the extract ready made.
The root beer extract is mixed with sugar, yeast and water. If this mixture is placed
in a tightly sealed bottle, the yeast will generate carbon dioxide at a high enough
pressure to carbonate the water. You end up with fizzy, delicious root beer!
 

12/8/99
Got the 10” converter back from Gene (it’s fine), and co-incidentally had a quick conversation with master converter builder, Chris Abrahamson of Continental, who happened to be at Auto-Rite. Nice people. And, got the Garage Mahal glass in, locked the door, closed the garage door. FINALLY! Capt Laur has returned, and we precipitated a flaw in the body winch system, resulting in a screw head popping off one pulley. That was enough to demonstrate the need for 2” lag screws in the 40 pulley holes. I’ll do that tomorrow morning when my tall ladders return from a job. I’m still searching for a crimping tool for the 3/16” cable, at less than a hundred bucks. Meanwhile, with temps in the low 50’s at night, I still have no heater. The Rheem rep came out and I showed him a defective plastic condensate trap I’d bypassed with hoses, and he said that alone prevents the furnace from working. We’ve replaced that, and now it works for about 5 minutes, up from 5 seconds. The Rheem rep now says we need 3.5# of gas pressure to run the furnace. It ran for 9 years as-is, but I’ve got the Gas Co coming tomorrow (ha!) to see. Cool, REAL REAL cool.
So to recap many of the (ha!) indications as of today, the plumber has not returned to connect the garage sink, the heater is still not working, the motor is not in, Randy’s car is not yet here, the trailer is not inside, there are still mountains of junk to be tossed (notwithstanding the numerous tossings so far), there is a little lift system tuning to be done, and this update is getting HUGE. The gutter guy IS coming next week to set the downspouts, the garage is locked, and the stucco is complete for now.
As much as I’ve wanted this update to end in a firing of the motor, a paint job completed, and other excitement (it’s been more like excrement so far), that won’t happen by the printing deadline.
So, boys and girls, stay tuned for the next exciting chapter of FC Operation Building 301. We’re hoping to graduate back to the race track soon.

12/9/99
The Gas Co guy came at 8 AM, couldn’t see anybody (we were here) and left a note and split. The fun never stops. Replaced the screws holding the lift pulleys with 2” lags, the first three of which snapped off. I revised my installation system and pre-bored the first 3/4” to alleviate that, combined with not torquing  them down much. Should have gone to grade 8 lags (wish they made them). These are about grade 2. The plumber moaned this morning he would come by late this afternoon (oh sure). I’m on my way to borrow a crimping tool to make up the ends. Tried the system last night, and aside from discovering that one pulley had 3 broken lags, I found a temporary end was indeed temporary. The rear of the body is SO stiff it barely changed position! Enough of this hoohah. The rental on the tool was all of $5!. Took about 10 minutes to do the ends, plus another 35 minutes of readjusting the cable lengths.  The angle of the rear hooks is too extreme without a pole through the eye bolts, so nice try, but back to a stiff pole. I’ll fill the one I have with high-strength concrete first, if no good then try to find a Rockwell 60 stainless rod I have around here somewhere, and if steps one and two fail finally spend another $50 and buy another 6’ of stainless solid Rockwell 54 rod.

12/10/99
The Gas Co showed up today, spent 45 minutes fooling with the furnace, and could find nothing wrong (of course) . He suggested some sensor changes, etc., none of which are in stock for this 8 year old furnace (which should go 20). So more days of 60 degrees in the furnished freezer. Ever wonder why they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

12/12/99
Got the motor in!!! The $#*@# 3-ton chain hoist is a piece of junk, however. The guards on it are bent (cast iron), and the thing was nightmare to barely make work. I’m intending to return it tomorrow to M&M Tools for a refund (it was used, but that’s moot, really). Marty has been fair in the past. Notwithstanding that, the engine and trans are in, the converter bolted up. The body tree now interferes with the mag, which is now about 1” forward of its prior location due to the addition of the PSI rev limiter.  I’m about to cut out the offending bar and weld a new one in a few inches higher. This means I will be firing up Randy’s welder for the first time in quite a while, and giving my inexpert hand a shot at welding again. This will be possible because I wired his plug up, and made an extension cord to use it anywhere in the garage. Millie spent some time consolidating her xmas stuff and other boxes, and I’m intending to put them in the attic over the service porch tomorrow, shove my stuff to other areas, and back the trailer in. Still no proper pushrods for the Condor from Jeg’s. I will be FAXing the BAR in a few moments to rattle their cage about getting me some money back as part of their action against the “idiot.” I have happily stumbled upon a Ford fanatic who is a customer, and I may push some work his way in trade for some construction. He’s cautioned it must be fun. Amen! He has a really nice ‘56 Ford panel truck with a 351 Windsor, for which he wants $7K. I will possibly negotiate a trade later and make it an advertising vehicle. It needs only a repaint and interior to be pristine. I am considering a car lift for the dual Birds. That way I can get the cars inside, including the dually, depending on whether Randy brings in his car. It’s doubtful Randy will permanently stage his car here. He has free parking close by his Newbury house once he’s in there, and his FC should need much less in the way of major work once its done. ‘Course he can always haul it here for some wrenching if need be. He has plans to eventually extend his garage back ala the Garage Mahal (no high ceilings, though), so he might have decent room after all. So I would say that our goal for this update has been met. The motor is in, and I’ll trial fit the headers as soon as I get the offending tree piece out.
Our next phase will be getting the thing down the track. I intend to do that before I take it apart for the powder coating, but we’ll see about that.

12/13/99
Well, yours truly, bubble gum welding, has accomplished the tree surgery. Man, do I need some practice! I did indeed need to cut the header openings up about 1/2” to compensate for the now-taller blocks.  On the house front, Rick Mauney of Rick’s Raingutter has shown up to complete this phase of rain gutters/downspouts. He had me on hold for 6 months, and won’t return again until late January to replace my other plastic gutters. Must be nice to be in demand for profitable work! I’m in demand, all right, but for collections. He’s setting the downspouts (his gutters are soldered steel construction) into the eagerly waiting collection basins set for that very purpose. Once I correct one bad switch in one of the 3 sump pumps (oh joy, another project) we will be as prepared as possible should we ever see any rain here again. Capt. Laur is settling into his new venue (a lower stress location), and is looking forward to more stress-free time to complete projects (like his FC). I’ve signed up for Sprint/Earthlink DSL (state of the art web connection). We’ll see if PacBell is up to speed yet in this area. That and a web site and this could just become a streaming (screaming?) narrative.

12/14/99
DSL will be installed 12/24. I wonder if we’ll have heat by then? Did some more calling and annoying of the Rheem reps and tried a few more things on the heater. Still cycles off at 4-5 minutes. This WILL heat the house a bit, only if I set it for one room. Man, this high-tech living is just great! The rep has re-promised it will be fixed or replaced. My hunch is it’s a little crappy sensor. You’ll find out next update. Haven’t located the I-know-it’s-here stainless 1” rod yet for the rear of the lift system.  Laur claims to be re-motivated now that I’ve set my motor in the chassis. It’s just amazing what a little help can do. Thanks, Mikey. The fiscal situation here is very much like the cartoon showing an unshaven, undershirted fellow sitting at a table in a seedy hotel room writing a letter: “.....No word yet from Publisher’s Clearing House.” Cash flow here is rampant, unfortunately it’s OUT. The plumber is STILL not able to get back here. AND, the hot water took a large dive today (must be a clogged shower valve). The fun just never stops here.
Called Enderle and I’ll check tomorrow if I can do an in-and-out on flowing the pump and new birdcatcher hat. Bill says it’s pretty open right now. This being accomplished, there’s no reason I couldn’t fire the beast up and at least make noise this century. As I now have a trusty little .030” gap tool for the starter, I may be able to end the interminable battle with grinding up flywheel teeth. And gee, I have TWO starters, too. In another amazing (and wonderful) turn of events, Dan Church, a new construction client and rabid Ford rodder, has mentioned some interest in looking at the FC body. If I let him loose, he’d probably grind all the bondo off and start over (where was he 3 years ago?). He even suggested making a mold to create a NEW version, with perfect lines and super light weight. God, could I stand light weight? While massively intriguing, this avenue of creativity will likely wait a while until we get the present system done. However, there is plenty to do UNDER the body, cosmetically and mechanically.

12/15/99
Speaking of creativity, Pat Manley, my HVAC guy, showed up this morning. He said his pager company was having tech problems, hence he got no pages during the week. He tried an unusual approach to getting the heater to continue working: he cut down the amount of gas going to the heater (partially closing the ball valve), and it seems to be working. My deduction is therefore that the gas valve/regulator is defective (duh).
Regarding light weight (or the inverse), yesterday I started  my program of not looking like Santa Claus by commencing a high-protein diet. I am probably going to taste like chicken soon! On the grinding table in his office, I mentioned my diet and got the printed hip program today from my Chiropractor, Mike Potkin, and will take his sound advice on doing the deal. Spent the better part of yesterday fooling with the FAX program, reinstalling software, sending some tests out, and getting that functioning. It is SO slow compared to e-mail. Given the size of this update, I’d need UPS to send all hard copies. Speaking of UPS, Jeg’s finally sent the Condor pushrods this afternoon. So it looks like I may just get the Big Bird running before the next century. Haven’t found the #%$*&% stainless rod as yet for the rear of the winch system. Maybe it will appear as my Christmas present along with a running roller-cammed Bird. For now, this weighty diary is YOURS. Happy Holidays.
See you in March. Feel free to check in at: 

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